For the first time since I began wearing glasses at age eight, the opthamologist has told me that I do not need a new pair. My prescription has changed very little, he said, and not enough to warrant a new pair unless I want them.

Wow.

So that's what that feels like. Cool.

Although I'm frickin' blind right now because my pupils are the size of dinner plates. Arggh. The light! The light! Someone turn off the blasted light!

Posted by: Kathy at 02:52 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Pffft.

That's as good a descriptor of my day as you're gonna get.

WARNING: RANT AHEAD. Duck and run if you feel the need.

The husband has vacated the premises. He has meetings this morning and a Microsquash seminar to attend this afternoon, so he'll be gone all day long. This is normally when I am the most productive. Not so today.

First, the husband missed his bus because he was putzing around. I never understand this: we literally live right across the fucking street from the bus stop yet HE CONSISTENTLY MISSES THE BUS because he's too busy with this, that or the other to get out there on time. I can deal with this, but it's becoming something of an annoyance, because it keeps happening over and over again. Anyway, he then calls me and asks me if can I go to the metro transit website and reroute him to see if he can make it over to St. Paul on time? I kept doing it wrong because I wasn't awake yet and he got impatient, I got impatient, I yipped at him. He kept his cool, but I could tell he was annoyed with me. Snipping at your spouse is not a great way to start your day. Trust me on this one. I still feel badly about it.

Then, not five minutes later, I get a call from the real estate people: there's been an offer on the house. The people who had put in the offer hadn't been able to see our apartment on their first shot through the house, could they please come through between noon and one today? Grrrrr.

This is just becoming one big annoyance. The real estate people keep testing our goodwill and it's pissing me off. By the terms of our lease---which are in accordance with Minnesota State Law---we are supposed to have 24 hours notice before our landlord can access our apartment. As the husband and I have to keep explaining to the little receptionist who keeps calling to schedule showings, TWENTY-FOUR HOURS MEANS TWENTY-FOUR HOURS! It does not mean schedule a ten-thirty a.m. showing for Tuesday at six-thirty p.m. Monday night, then call the tenants and ask them if that's ok. Argggh. We've been firm, but they keep doing this. That they have to coordinate with the people downstairs doesn't help either because they don't think they can say 'no'.

Add that to the fact we have not yet received our new lease from the Great White Hunter landlord, and there's been an offer. Just marvelous, eh?

Next up on the list o' whines: I have my opthamologist appointment at one. I don't have an issue with this. This is fine. It needs to happen. But I hate having my eyes dilated. I'm not a big fan of eye drops in the first place, but these sting. Then you have the fun of trying to get home without seeing too much because of all the damn light! Aieeeee.

After that, I have to try and get a hold of the husband's probation officer. He wants to talk to me to confirm that the husband isn't drinking. Great. I just adore being put in this position. It's not like the husband is drinking. He hasn't had a drink for going on two years. He doesn't want one, either. But it's not like the State of Minnesota believes any of that given his record, so where do they go for confirmation of the husband's claims?

Me.

Apparently the fact he's enrolled in a fully licensed and state approved aftercare program isn't good enough for them.

I have to call this guy and be interrogated. And it's not like I've got a choice, either, because if I don't call this guy and subject myself to interrogation, they'll become suspicious of the husband and will insist on greater supervision. While this phone call will last for exactly two minutes, it still bugs me. Undoubtedly I'm blowing it out of proportion, but it's just one more brick added to a huge stack of bricks and it annoys me. The whole thing makes me feel like I'm being used. They put me between the rock and the hard place, because of course I want the husband to be done with all of this, yet I don't have a choice about my cooperation. The husband will pay if I don't cooperate. They're taking advantage of my need to be done with all of this. And I REALLY DON'T LIKE IT.

I'm a firm believer, because I've lived it, that the State will use any means to get drunk drivers to end their wicked ways, and if that means making life difficult for the drunk driver's spouse, they'll do it. Think about it: when a drunk driver loses their license, who winds up driving them around? Their spouse, mostly. When a drunk driver is fined up the wazoo, whose finances are hurt just as badly as the drunk drivers? The spouses. I could go on, but I think you get the gist: they don't give a damn about the havoc they wreak on people who had nothing to do with the original offense. They're just collateral damage, and honestly, if they'd just had the good sense to take the keys away, they wouldn't be going through this in the first place. It's their own damn fault. Well, I was in Montana for this last one: explain to me how, being a thousand miles away, I was supposed to keep the husband, a licensed and insured driver, from getting behind the wheel?

Sorry. I get a little bitter about this shit.

Ah, anyway, I have to go and get my eyes dilated and be subjected to a round of "better one? better two? better one? better two?"

Posted by: Kathy at 12:42 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Ok, something's wrong with my eyes.

They're swollen.

I don't know what the heck is going on. A couple of days ago, whilst checking for any signs of new lines, I noticed that my epicanthic folds were pronounced. As in, there is no point in wearing eyeshadow right now as you wouldn't be able to see it. I thought I was imagining things, but the husband confirmed the puffiness. Hence I took it as a sign that---poof---my lids, ala my mom, had dropped. A sign of age and a hereditary one, too. Nothing ususual there. While disturbing, I am thirty-four, baby. It had to happen sometime. It was disconcerting it happened all at once, but hey, isn't that the way these things usually happen? I dunno. All those lines magically appeared overnight, why wouldn't my eyelids droop the same way?

Just as I was getting accustomed to this notion, that's when the headache kicked in. Now, I'm not normally prone to headaches. I just don't get them. Considering I'm married to an occasional migraine sufferer, I know I'm lucky in this regard. The only kind of headache I do get is when my glasses are either new or need to be upgraded. I will fully admit that I'm a year behind on my checkup schedule. As in I picked up the pair of glasses I'm wearing now on September 12, 2001. I was supposed to pick them up on the 11th, but other stuff got in the way and they closed the mall. This is that kind of headache: the eye strain headache.

Yesterday I had a slight headache that wore on during the day and into the night. It's back again today. I've done the advil and while that helps, it hurts slightly to stare at the computer screen, so posting will be light. But since I got the headache, I've begun to wonder about this whole thing. So, like a good little hypochondriac, I surfed around WebMD. And no, I don't have Bells Palsy. I'm not drooling, I can blink, and I can still feel my face and operate it. But as far as it being anything else specific, the vast amount of knowledge that is WebMD coughed up bupkiss. The husband thinks it might be an allergic reaction to something, but as I've done absolutely nothing new in the past few days---nothing new eaten, no new product, etc.---I don't know.

I'm assuming all of this is due to the fact that my prescription needs to be upgraded. But can that cause my eyes to swell? Can your eyes swell in the first place? And to an extent where it changes your facial features? I don't know and I haven't called the doctor, lest he tell me it's possible I've got a brain tumor. I don't think I could deal with that right now and I'd rather live in ignorance, thank you ever so much.

Any ideas? Anyone dealt with this or something similar.

I'm not dying or anything. Don't freak out, please. And yes, I'm referring to you, Mom.

UPDATE: Just got off the phone with ML's wife, The Doctor, and given my symptoms she believes it's computer related eye stress. When I told her I hadn't been spending any more time on the box than usual, she shot me down. Computer related eye stress, says she, is cumulative. I'm supposed to look up computer ergonomics on the web and that there should be some good eye-saving tips that should help. We shall see if it works. I hope it does.

Thanks for the kind words, everyone. I appreciate it And yes Kitty, I will go to the doctor if it doesn't get better.

Posted by: Kathy at 01:52 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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1 No freaking out allowed! I am not a Doctor so this is not medical advice, just practical. I'm very close to turning 52 and have gradually noticed a slight drooping and swelling of the upper eyelid. But this has been over a period of years, not days. Sudden drooping, along with a headache and the inability to look at a computer screen or read a book for very long should ring a bell with you that something isn't right. The drooping could be pushing on the eyeball causing the headache, etc. So, get thee to a physician! It's probably something very simple, but you don't want to chance permanently damaging your eyes. This is a THREAT!!!If you don't go see a doctor, I'm going to write to "The Husband" and then send copies to all my medical friends. While you're waiting to get in to see the Doctor, lie down and put cold compresses on your eyes. Take care of yourself, we need you to keep us up to date on pressing world issues. Kitty :^)

Posted by: K. Mason at January 20, 2005 02:39 PM (THsAz)

2 Yes, your eyes can swell -- I have a lovely allergy to eggs that has been known to swell them to the point where, if it happens while I'm sleeping, I can't open my eyelids to save my life (And if it's while I'm awake? Well, I'm just saying you wouldn't want to have a staring contest with me then...) -- this is why I now know that Milky Way bars contain egg whites...

Posted by: LDH at January 20, 2005 02:41 PM (bqPDz)

3 Have you figured it out yet? I'll ask the good doctor when she gets home from the dentist. I don't think she know that much about eye symptoms, though. Pregnant? Yeah, I know, very funny. It can bloat all or parts of the face, you know. Are you tired, too?

Posted by: ML in MN at January 20, 2005 02:46 PM (Dvbxq)

4 Also keep track of what you eat, because of food allergies. Either way, I hope you're well, happy and thriving by now!

Posted by: Fausta at January 21, 2005 06:56 AM (LtiJz)

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So, the Cake Eater Pad went up on the market yesterday.

We already are scheduled for two showings today.

If they think I'm going to leave the house while people walk through, they're kidding themselves.

In fact, I believe I'm going to try and hinder the showings. Would that be bad of me? I don't know. One little thing I can do to spoil it is to turn on the dishwasher while people are walking through. We have this problem wherein once you turn it on, the pipes in the wall rattle loudly. This really isn't all that surprising: it's just one more problem with the place that needs fixing, but it's bound to be expensive. No one's touched the plumbing in that wall for years, and there's no access panel to get at it, either. The husband informs me you can hear the rattling all the way down in the basement, too.

As much as I'm not fond of our current landlord, I have this feeling I should try and warn potential buyers off. Just in case some poor schlub decides this place is a good deal and is unaware of just how much works needs to be done.

Neither am I fond of this real estate agent. He's a big ball of cheese. "Hey, How ya doin'?" He seems more suited to be selling used cars than houses. And he's already tried to test our good will. According to the terms of our lease, if the landlord wants access to our apartment, they have to give us twenty-four hours notice. Well, the guy's secretary called us yesterday to schedule a showing at 10 this morning and she called at 9:50 a.m. While pushing it, that's fine and legal and I have no problems with it. The agent himself, though, called to schedule a showing for this afternoon well past the twenty-four hour cutoff. The husband politely informed him, "twenty-four hours means twenty-four hours." I know the guy will try to push it again, and we have plans to coordinate with the downstairs neighbors to block any and all attempts---across the board---that violate the 24-hour rule.

Oh, and did I mention that the downstairs neighbors are FREAKED OUT about this? Not good. Apparently, Tweedledumb just left a message on their voice mail. He didn't talk to them directly to explain the situation and he really didn't take into account that because they're not American and have no experience with home sales here, they didn't know what this meant. The husband had to calm them down because they were afraid they were going to have to pack it up and move right away. Sigh.

So, there's my ethical dilemma for the day. Should I mess with them? Any ideas, kids?

UPDATE: I should have anticipated that real estate agents themselves would be the first ones to walk through this property.

A guy just walked through, seemed surprised to see me in the kitchen and then started grilling me about the property. First question out of his mouth: "How long have you lived here?" "Five years," I replied. His eyes lit up like a tree at Christmas.

Then he proceeded to ask questions about all the problems the house has and I answered them. I don't know whether I turned him off, but he wasn't too interested in looking around after our chat, so who knows?

I sincerely hope I'm not going to get in trouble with GWH and Tweedledumb.

UPDATE II: Just looked out at the front lawn, and there is a big yellow line that was spray painted across the icy front yard. The husband and I think this is right where our nicely tree root-corrupted sewer line is.

If they think they can replace a sewer line in January, they're nuts. And if they think they're going to do it while we're still living here, they're nuts. I'm not going without water and indoor plumbing for weeks on end.

Not gonna happen.

Posted by: Kathy at 09:58 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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