A little over a month ago I get this envelope in the mail. Or rather, the husband, got this envelope in the mail up at his shop. It had somehow been forwarded up yonder thanks to the genius that is the United States Postal Service and its merry band of screwy brothers.

Since I get a lot of envelopes in the mail, and most of them are from people I owe money to, that we received an envelope in the mail is generally not too big of a deal in the scheme of things. What was a big deal, however, was the somewhat cryptic return address on said envelope. You might imagine that, with an unusual return address, the husband would decide to have a little fun. After much taunting me via email, he finally clued me in on the return address.

It read: The Joint Staff, C4 Systems Directorate (J6).

Huh?

And that's all the husband emailed me.

So, after a few moments of me pondering if the man I married had a slight sadistic streak to him, the husband decided he knew what was good for him and gave up the goods without further delay: turns out it was an invitation to a retirement review for my cousin, Dennis, aka The Big Cheese.

This is Dennis. That would be Major General Dennis C. Moran to you, my devoted Cake Eater readers. There's going to be a band playing and a parade in his (and two other retiring generals') honor at Fort Myer, Virginia this afternoon. Hell, they might even shoot off some ammunition, I just wouldn't count on it if you happen to be the in vicinity. The Army's cheap that way.

Longtime devoted Cake Eater readers will know that I've hinted here and there that I had a relative who was a Grand Poobah in the service. For you, my devoted Cake Eater readers, the mystery is finally solved. (You knew I'd get around to it sometime, didn't you? Way to keep the faith!) I never outed Dennis before because I figured he had enough to deal with. I may never have outed Dennis to you, my devoted Cake Eater readers, and while I'm fairly certain he's delightfully ignorant about the existence of this blog, he is important in Cake Eater Lore, if anyone cares about such things, because he's the reason why I have never, ever criticized the Armed Forces or the invasion or anything military related on this here blog. It has nothing to do with fears of putting him in harm's way---he's Signals; he's generally never in harm's way when he's actually at war, but rather well behind the harm---but rather because I didn't want to come off like some idiot Napoleon-wannabe, thinking I knew more about the situation than I actually did. Because generals always know more than some idiot blogger, who probably thinks that because they watched the original bombardment of Baghdad on CNN in 1991 they have some right---and the necessary skill---to criticize current military maneuvers. (Andrew Sullivan, thy name is legend.) There are plenty of those folks in the blogosphere. Don't get me wrong: they're entitled to come off like a jackass if they want to. But I know from personal experience (over plates of funeral food in my brother's basement, if you must know the awful truth--oh, yeah, you can almost smell the awkwardness, can't you?) you just generally sound like an idiot when you don't have all the information involved. Dennis taught me this, even if that wasn't his intention.

After a long and fulfilling career in the military, Dennis is finally hanging it up today. We've long followed his career and we've always been proud of him and his numerous accomplishments. (Except when he worked in Bubba Clinton's White House, but that's another story entirely) Of course, chemo is preventing me from actually attending the review, which is a crying ass shame because there's no place I'd rather be later today. He deserves the fanfare of a big parade and review because he's toiled in the background for our country, making sure people could talk to one another, ever since he was in college---over thirty years ago. He's yet another soldier who was just doing their job, but he's done it well and for that I thank him.

Congratulations Dennis!

Posted by: Kathy at 11:14 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Why, why, why must all the good parties happen the day after I have chemo?

First, I missed these guys' bash. And that's always a shame because Tracy and the LME always put out a good spread. Lubricated with lots of good booze, too.

Now I must miss yet another chance to spend the evening, flitting hither and thither around the bar, hiding from Lileks.

Because you know he's my biggest fan.

It's just not fair, damnit.

Posted by: Kathy at 04:56 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Sniff.

Please, God, let little Connie win. That will show me there is at least a modicum of justice in this world. Paris Hilton's in the slammer and this little girl, singing for the Queen. Justice, baby. Justice.

All will be right in the world if she wins.

Hat tip: WWTDD---which is completely random if you're a follower of that blog. Seriously.

Posted by: Kathy at 02:03 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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