April 30, 2005
Your Birthdate: November 5 |
With a birthday on the 5th of the month you are inclined to work well with people and enjoy them. You are talented and versatile, very good at presenting ideas. You may have a tendency to get itchy feet at times and need change and travel.
You tend to be very progressive, imaginative and adaptable. Your mind is quick, clever and analytical. A restlessness in your nature may make you a bit impatient and easily bored with routine. You may have a tendency to shirk responsibility |
Yeah, I would have to say that's pretty true. As far as the bad stuff, I have a built-in excuse: I'm a Scorpio. Everyone knows we're nutso.
Hat Tip: Chrissy
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Which makes her worthy of being worshipped, if you ask me.
She's also right on about movies about the disabled and Rosie O'Donnell.
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12:31 PM
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Because these movies used to be fun, right?
They used to be magical.
Now, we all could go on about how George Lucas is a money-grubbin', kiddie-entertain', legacy rapist---and I'm not saying he doesn't deserve those titles---but let's be honest about a few things here, ok?
1. Like myself, you're all going to go and see Episode III. You just are. You've been suckered yet again. Like myself. I have to see how the story ends and so do you.
2. You're somewhat excited about going to see Episode III. You may feel dirty about being excited, like you do when you watch pr0n or go to a strip club, but you are excited nonetheless.
So, like the man who ditches the guilt and loads up on one dollar bills before a trip to sniffer's row, it's time to load up on some pre-Episode III fun.
Which is why I'm announcing, {insert drumroll and much fanfare here}
Here's the deal. In the Cake Eater household, there are many boxes labeled with the brand name, "Trivial Pursuit." One of these boxes just also happens to have the Star Wars logo on it with the phrase "Classic Trilogy Collector's Edition" printed right below it. Each day until the movie is released (May 19, 2005), I will pick one card, post all the questions, and whomever answers them all correctly (or gets the most correct...some of these questions are very obscure) will receive the gratitude of a blogosphere (and this blogger) for having the guts to have some freakin' fun with this whole thing. And If the winner of the day emails me a picture of themself, I'll p'shop them into a Storm Trooper uniform or, in the case of Princess Leia's metal bikini, I'll put their head (or the head of their beloved) on her body. Same goes with any other character. Just think of the possibilities---they're endless.
These are all questions from Star Wars, The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi. There will be no questions from Episode I or Episode II. (This edition was released right before Episode I came out. ) There might be questions from the Special Editions, but I'm not really sure. I've never played this game because the husband knows all of this stuff backwards and forwards and I do not generally enjoy being spanked in Trivial Pursuit, so I've never actually played this edition. This might make it too easy for you, if you're a dedicated Geek who still has The Millenium Falcon in its original box, but it should be fun for everyone, ya dig?
It's time to have some fun with all of this, so in the spirit of said fun, I would ask you not to go out and Google the answers. It's no fun if you do that and this is supposed to be fun, damnit! HAVE SOME FUN!
Without further ado, Here are today's questions:
- What was Piett's rank in the Imperial military at the start of The Empire Strikes Back?
- What type of machine on the first Death Star bore the unit number 3263827?
- What suggestion of Darth Vader's prompted Luke to attack Vader in a murderous rage?
- What massive object did Darth Vader's flagship collide with?
- What Rebel had an alien co-pilot named Nien Nunb in Return of the Jedi
- Who, according to Grand Moff Tarkin, was the last of the Jedi?
I'll post the answers and the winner tomorrow (you know, if anyone actually participates! Don't make me look like an idiot here, ok?)
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10:51 AM
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April 29, 2005
A small sampling.
{...}Men don't understand bras - or breasts for that matter. This should maybe be a topic for the divas...I don't know. All I know is, most men seem to think of breasts as toys. You know, the x-wing fighters of their adult world. Very few men I've met have not been utterly fascinated by breasts. Touch, squeeze, twist, twit, they do love to play.{...}
The husband would swear that the "Most Technologically Advanced Bra in The World tagline for these things is meant to appeal to men and not women. After all, boys have to have the latest and greatest toys in the world or they're just not cool. When they were kids, it was all about Big Wheels and that sort of thing. Nowadays it's pricey cell phones and stereo equipment. Why not tap into that market by billing a bra as "the most technologically advanced"? The theory going on that men would buy their chicks these titslingers using the same criteria as they'd use to buy a pair of speakers.
Makes sense.
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10:56 PM
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It's surprising that CAIR endorsed the film. To quote from Justin's post:
{...}The fact that a sue-happy, terror-apologist group like CAIR actually put its seal of approval on the film should be quite damning. (Do you suppose that the filmmakers bothered to show Christian/Catholic leaders an advance screening of the film to get their input and seal of approval? Not likely. That should speak volumes about the cynical nature of this film.){...}
Hmmmph.
I don't agree with that. Given the strong theme of the glories of Western Civilization in Ridley's other films, such as Black Hawk Down, I'm not going to be so quick to condemn the movie simply because CAIR endorsed it. Ridley's got a track record when it comes to defending Western Civilization. I'm willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. If he chooses to show what could be considered to be a low point for Western Civilization, which many people think the Crusades were, then score one for Ridley. Sometimes Western Civilization needs to be defended from itself. Whether this is one of those instances, I do not know. It could be utter crap. Again, I don't know. I haven't seen it. But, I'm certainly not going to take CAIR's word that it's great as proof that it's politcally correct crap, either.
I can judge these things for myself.
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03:08 PM
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April 28, 2005
{...}Perhaps youÂ’d recognize Wonkette if you saw her, dear reader: SheÂ’s a thin, wan 30-something gal who looks as if sheÂ’s been genetically engineered to live in a bog. She makes an albino look like Isaac Hayes.But never mind the fact that Wonkette clearly resembles that girl from your kindergarten class who used to pick her nose and eat it. ThatÂ’s hardly why she ruffles our collective feathers.
Why, you are no doubt asking yourself, is the crack young staff so oft perturbed by the on-screen antics of Ms. Wonkette?
In short, itÂ’s because sheÂ’s egregiously self-impressed, as if making snippy remarks about Jeff Gannon is really so difficult. As she offers her inevitably snarky remarks about the World According to Wonkette, she resembles nothing so much as the InternetÂ’s Marie Antoinette.
“Let me tell you how the world works,” she intones, clad in vertiginous pastels that violently clash with her Conan O’Brien color palette.
To which we, the crack young staff of “The Hatemonger’s Quarterly,” reply: Look, Wonkette. We’re sorry you didn’t make the cheerleading squad in high school because your ribs are iridescent. But could you please can the smugness? You’re like David Spade and Dennis Miller’s love child, for crying out loud.{...}
Interestingly enough, I read somewhere that Wonkette was originally from Lincoln, Nebraska. You know, that town in Nebraska where this school is. As most of you know, I grew up in Omaha. When I was in high school, places like The Old Market were our popular hangouts. Until the loser Lincoln kids started showing up.
It was our general opinion that they mixed quite well with the white trash from Council 'Tucky, who had actually managed to be more hip and started hanging out over on our side of the river, "scooping the loop" in the Market in their white trash cars. Which means they drove around the cobbled streets of the Market about five thousand times a night. The Lincoln kids, well...you could tell who they were and why they were there just by looking at them. They'd driven the sixty some odd miles to get someplace hip. Someplace cool. Because Lincoln is just not cool. It has no cul-chah for those who are not interested in banging the Cornhusker drum. That they thought Omaha was an oasis of cool in the vast Nebraska wilderness spoke volumes. Because while they thought they'd reached paradise, well, most of us were ready to get the hell out of there.
I'd bet my left boob that Wonkette was one of those kids.
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01:04 PM
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Yes, that's right. Vader's got a blog.
{Hat Tip: Doug, who got it from Sandy}
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11:05 AM
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April 27, 2005
Lest things get down and out at his blog in his absence, he has a contest going. Puzzles are involved. *With REAL prizes* for the winners.
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01:15 PM
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Damn. That is one eeeeee-vil looking cat.
And it's been cracking me up all morning long.
(Courtesy of one of the husband's gaming friends)
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12:47 PM
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Since our Maximum Leader is a cheapskate who would prefer to buy lightsabers and Darth Taters instead of chipping out for some blogging software that enables comments, and who is too lazy to put freebie Haloscan comments on his blog, I find I am forced to bring this over to my blog. cough cough, link whore.
To answer the Maximum Leader's question: yes, his friend should have given the relative up. No offense to Joe for having principles, but a year of hard time in a federal penitentiary and a year on work release is too much to pay for said principles. He should have saved his own ass, particularly since his relative wasn't owning up to his part in the whole matter and it was obvious they were going to do their darndest to make him cooperate because they had no other evidence against the relative. (Although, one does wonder about how they knew to show up at Joe's door.) The law of self-preservation reigns supreme when dealing with the criminal justice system.
And believe me, I know about these things.
You cannot trust prosecutors. You cannot trust public defenders. You cannot trust anyone other than the lawyer you hire (and you'd better hire a good one, even if you're an auxilary portion of any case) and yourself. That is the extent of it. No one other than yourself matters.
Is this selfish? Yep. You bet. I'm sorry for it, but that's just the way the world works, particularly the legal world. And people will take advantage if you're not looking out for yourself. This is how I suspect Joe wound up in a world of hurt over a plasma tv. I also suspect Joe is regretting this decision every day of his life. The poor guy.
I don't like the idea of rewarding tattlers, like the school system in the Max Leader's original link is advocating, with parking spots and other school perks. Methinks that the kid who parks their car in the designated tattler spot will get their ass kicked sooner rather than later. No one likes a narc, after all, nor should they, and kids are remarkably good at sussing this sort of thing out. In that situation, the tattler is doing it for perks, rather than because it's the right thing to do. But when you must save your own ass? Well, that's a different deal altogether. You are in trouble and you have suddenly found yourself with a piece of very much wanted information: this is your bargaining power. You must use it to save yourself. You must.
Why?
Because if the shoe was on the other foot, you could bet your last dollar the other guy would be spilling the beans.
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12:34 AM
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April 26, 2005
Yeah, I know I'm supposed to turn green with envy. I may screw up most things, but on this one I know what I'm doing. Go read the post, doof.
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11:21 PM
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April 25, 2005
Landing at Anzac Cove
Today is the 90th Anniversary of the Allied invasion of the Gallipoli Peninsula during WWI.
{...}The landings, which infamously saw waters on the coast stained red with the blood of dead soldiers, were intended to open a passage through the Dardanelles Straights separating Europe from Asia to provide a relief route to allied Russia via the Black Sea.Instead the expedition ended in retreat and failure, after eight months of what Helen Clark, the New Zealand Prime Minister, today described as "hell".
Perhaps the most poignant illustration of the failure of the expedition is the fact that, with the allies forced to retreat from Gallipoli and unable to return until after the war, only 9,000 of the 22,000 Commonwealth soldiers who were buried lie in identified graves. The remains of more than 14,000 have never been found, their bones resting in the rugged terrain of Gallipoli.
Fierce resistance from the under-rated Ottoman forces, inhospitable terrain and bungled planning, spelt disaster for the campaign, which involved British, Irish, French, Indian, Canadian, Australian and New Zealand forces.
Among those who suffered the greatest losses were the Anzacs, the Australian and New Zealand Army Corps, who made the first landings, swept by an unexpected current to a narrow cove rather than the wide beaches the planners intended. The campaign is seen as a defining moment in the move towards nationhood in both countries, and April 25 is marked as Anzac Day in both countries.
The campaign, centred on territory close to the site of the ancient city of Troy, was one of the biggest maritime invasion attempts ever staged. Unlike the recent D-Day commemorations there were no surviving veterans of the campaign at todayÂ’s international gatherings.{...}
For more information on Gallipoli, go here. Make sure to pay attention to the numbers of wounded and dead.
{Photos Courtesy of The Anzac Photo Gallery}
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01:42 PM
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April 24, 2005
Thank God. That dumb wench's taking the heat off me! WooT!
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11:54 PM
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I'm late in posting this, but my beer has been making the rounds again, and made it to the Spring Game in Ames last weekend.
Russ reports:
Oh yeah, and "your beer" enjoyed the game. "She" got to pose with the Jack Trice statue outside the stadium. I was going to set her in his hand, but Jeez, that would be freakin' sacreligious.
Jack Trice, God Rest His Soul, was the first African-American football player at Iowa State University, and the first athlete ever to die for Iowa State. His is an exceedingly sad tale, which is why there are statues of him, not only at the football stadium that is named after him, but on campus as well. If I'm remembering the story correctly, nothing ever happened to the three Minnesota players who trampled him. They couldn't say for sure that it was intentional. (Pah!) I agree with Russ that it would have been sacreligious for my beer to have whined about not being placed into Jack's hand. My beer knows better than that.
It seems my beer is trying to make amends for hanging out with Hawkeyes and for her floozy-ish behavior in KC. One can only hope she learned her lessons after hanging out with a legend.
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10:30 PM
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April 23, 2005
The Cake Eater Chronicles: Where inbreeding with the Llamas is---apparently---just around the corner!
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05:18 PM
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I've recently become a big fan of his. While I don't always agree with the things he writes or how he writes them, it's very refreshing to read a blogger who, unlike myself, takes no prisoners.
At times he can be about as abrasive as steel wool would be to your private parts, but he cleverly wraps this abrasiveness up in an impressive wit, so you really don't mind the stinging sensation all that much. I would highly recommend you go over and check him out.
Love him or hate him, you won't be bored.
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01:27 PM
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It's probably just as well, Chrissy, that you never got past explaining the object of the game. I simply cannot imagine the pain of having to explain how a knight moves to a small child. Oy. The husband about blew a gasket when he had to explain the knights' movement to me, and that was when I was an adult. Don't tell anyone but they're still my glaring blindspot whenever I play. I just can't think as many steps ahead with the knights as I do with the other pieces. Everything else, I can pretty much suss out eight, nine, ten steps ahead. The knights, however? Well, sigh. They continue to baffle me.
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01:03 PM
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April 22, 2005
Earlier this week, I was walking home from the store when a beautiful late-50's, butter yellow, MG convertible whipped around the corner and took off down the street right in front of me. This thing was mint. Everything shone and gleamed and looked as it should look. A gorgeous car. Someone should consider themselves really fortunate to own such a beautiful vehicle on a gorgeous day, when they would be able to enjoy it to the fullest because it was a convertible. Well, guess who that special someone was, that lucky soul who was driving that gorgeous car?
Behind the wheel was a redheaded, sixteen-year-old, well-dressed brat who was undoubtedly skipping school as it was ten in the morning.
That would be when I started turning green with envy. It's completely possible that some stupid parent here in the fair fiefdom of Cake Eater Land, where there's more money than sense, had given their kid this car as a present. It's also completely possible that this kid had ripped it off from his parents' garage and was pulling a Ferris Bueller.
Either way, I hate them. I hate them. I hate them. A pox on their house.
Gosh, I really miss driving. I really miss Miss Marie, too.
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08:24 PM
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Where he's heckling the Llamas with graphic storytelling.
Heh.
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08:00 PM
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April 21, 2005
God help us all.
We all know from watching Alias that Jennifer could probably do a four-minute mile if she pushed it. I would highly recommend running. That boy has serious issues.
In other Alias related news: I simply cannot believe that they're going to kill off Jack. I want to weep in my beer. I adore Daddy Bristow. Daddy Bristow is sexy as all hell (even though it appears Daddy Bristow is gay in real life.). He's one of the major reasons why I watch Alias. I don't want him to die! Waaaaaaah. Jack's like a sexy Henry Kissinger who not only knows about balance of power intimately---and could write you a thesis on it---but also knows how to throw a mean karate chop if needs be. Could you ask for more? I don't think so.
And for those of you who might think I'm a wee bit obsessive about this, just know that the husband has been rooting for Mommy to come back for quite some time and still holds out hope that Jack didn't actually do the dreaded deed and that's she's alive somewhere. Even if Sydney did see the body and buried her. This is Alias we're talking about, here, kids. Anything's possible.
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02:38 PM
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