Caveat Emptor
I've just finished up with an interesting assignment: reading through a published novel and offering the author a critique.
The author is a local chap---who shall remain nameless, because I don't want to hurt him or his prospects in any way, shape or form---a gentleman the husband knows, and, somehow, the offer of a free copy turned into a project of reading, rereading, scouring the book for mistakes and then producing a brief critique. He has been wondering why it isn't selling. I am sad to say that, after reading it, it's obvious as to why it hasn't become a bestseller. I didn't have too many nice things to say about the book, but fortunately, the author seemed grateful for my honesty---so much so that he would like me to publish my review on Amazon and Barnes and Noble. I'll admit, I was a bit surprised at that. If someone had handed me a review like I handed him, I would have been dismissive, crabby and wounded, before grudgingly agreeing, a few days later, that they may have a point. He was grace personified in his acceptance.
I had a few problems with the book, but my main problem was that it could have been tighter. Much tighter. An international thriller should not meander. It should be sharp and to the point, while keeping the reader on the edge of their seat. This book didn't, for the most part, manage that. In my estimation, there's probably a hundred pages and a subplot or two that could be lost, and it would help the book tremendously---and would make it an international best seller. I'm absolutely sure of it. It may have its problems, but it's better than some of the current bestsellers out there. Trust me on this one. A decent editor would have solved this problem the first time around to make it sell. They would have seen that the diamond needed some polishing, and would have cut what didn't need to be there. Unfortunately, he didn't have a decent editor. He didn't have an editor at all. He simply has a publisher, who does nothing for him, other than printing his book. He published through a local company which charges him a small fortune to put copies on bookstore shelves (and even on Amazon). He is responsible for promoting his book, and as he's retired from another career that is miles away from publishing, and is somewhat shy, I can understand why he has trouble with this.
This is one of those cases where it obviously does not pay to self-publish. And it would behoove people to realize precisely what they're getting if they choose to take this tack in publishing their book. I've never really wanted to do this, despite encouragement from the husband and others, simply because while I can sell a product, particularly if I have stake in it, but I need a framework to do so. Self-publishing does not provide said framework. Yes, you will retain the rights. Yes, you will make more money if the book takes off, but if you do not have any idea of what is required to get your book onto shelves and how to get them off shelves and into people's eager little hands, it probably won't happen in the first place. There are more self-published successes in recent years, thanks to the glories of the internet, but they're still far and few in between. Of course, if you choose to go the traditional route, this means you're taking a much rougher path to having a published work, but it might just be worth it in the long run. I'd bet a hundred bucks this guy's publisher didn't even instruct him on how to put together a media kit, like some self-publishing companies do, because, after all, the publisher is already making money on each copy. It may not be as much as they could make it they helped to promote the book, but then again, they don't incur those costs, either. Some profit is better than none, or a huge loss if the book fails to sell.
I feel extremely sorry for this gentleman, because the plot, in all actuality, is nothing different than what Robert Ludlum (or the shadow writers publishing under the good graces of the Ludlum Estate. You do know the guy is dead, right? The Cake Eater Mother absolutely refuses to believe me when I tell her this. Yes, Mom, he has been IN THE GROUND for about seven years and everything published since has been written by ghosters. Wikipedia may not be the most accurate source about some things, but they generally get the death dates right.) or Dan Brown might have produced. Seriously. He's got that much right, and the book definitely has potential. He just needs a massive edit to make it successful, and I don't know if, after all he's tried to do to promote this book in its current form and how much money he's invested to get it onto shelves, he'll want to take that path. Fortunately for him, he still owns the rights to the book. He can do with it as he will, so the option of an edit is available to him, if he chooses to partake of it. He could easily do this, call it a second edition, and shop it around to other, full-service publishers. Ironically, the fact that he's published, even if it is of the self-service variety, will help him find an agent and a publisher more quickly than if he hadn't self-published. I can only hope he realizes that this is his best option.
So, I offer this up as a cautionary tale: if you are a burgeoning writer and think self-publishing is the way to go, be aware of the pitfalls. If you have some grounding in the book business, have a load of cash to get your books on the shelves, and know how to promote your book to recoup the cash outlay, go for it. But if you're simply tired of sending out queries and sample chapters to agents and publishers and the rejection letters they send out in return, and want to bypass all the bluster, just be aware of what you're getting yourself into. Patience can and does pay off, and it probably pays off more handsomely.
2
I agree - I started a writing group a while back, and several of our members have now self-published (much against my suggestion). The one is truly an amazing writing, and I think she could have easily been published main stream. However, her lack of understanding of the market may hurt her as she attempts to peddle it herself. The other....she should NOT have self-published. Amazing plot, poorly written work. If only she had gone the traditional route....
Much agreed!!
Posted by: Verity at May 20, 2008 06:57 AM (4l9QA)
A Christian group out of San Diego has found grounds for outrage over the new logo for Starbucks Coffee.
The Resistance says the new image "has a naked woman on it with her legs spread like a prostitute," Mark Dice, founder of the group, said in a news release. "Need I say more? It's extremely poor taste, and the company might as well call themselves, Slutbucks."
The group, which claims more than 3,000 members nationwide, is calling for a national boycott of the coffee-selling giant.{...}
Charbucks has gone from this
To this:
Notice anything different about the second one, other than that it's got a "slutty" naked chick on it? (Never minding the fact that the woman on the logo doesn't, indeed, have legs "spread like a prostitute," like Mr. Dice claims. She, apparently, doesn't have legs at all. )
Well, gee, Gomer, could it be that it's printed in black and white instead of color?
While Charbucks is selling this as a "keeping it real" move, this is more likely about money. Color in the logo costs money. And if they have to print cups and napkins, etc., with black, white and green, you can be sure the green is costing them coin. Switching to a black and white logo is the money saving equivalent of American Airlines taking one olive off every meal they served: it's a small move, but it's coin that can be used for other things. Like buoying up their decreasing stock price. Because that's what this is about: keeping those shareholders happy. They've apparently realized that they can't sell more coffee, so they've got to find the pennies wherever they can find them to keep the stock from decreasing any further.
But that's really beside the point: some Christian group is po'ed because there's a naked chick on the Charbucks logo.
Sigh.
Don't these people have anything better to do with their time? You know, there are millions of people around the world who are, with increasing regularity, falling victim to the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse (you know, famine, plague, war and pestilence) and this is what they choose to get their knickers in a twist about? A naked chick on a coffee cup? A logo that won't even be seen once the barista puts the cardboard coffee clutch on the cup? Get real, would you? Go and picket the Burmese embassy. Your social activism will be put to better use---and, ahem, it might actually accomplish something worthwhile.
1
I suspect what Mr. Dice is really upset about is that if you look really close, the right breast is labeled "soy, no whip".
Your advice to Dice is spot on.
2
Cripes! Talk about blood and stones. After they hoover my wallet for a four dollar latte every morning do they really think I have the extra coin to blow on a hooker?
As Gob would say, "C'mon!!"
4
dude can bite me. Go save a strving child, willya?
Posted by: caltechgirl at May 16, 2008 04:21 PM (IfXtw)
5
More than that, it's Starbucks going back to that logo; it's the original one from Before Massive Fame.
Though on another level, the critic is right - the "mermaid" (more aptly a siren*) on the Starbucks logo in question really is a sexual symbol.
(* Medieval confusion making a "siren", while not mythologically originally a water-dweller like the mermaid, into a form of mermaid with a sometimes-split tail. And I tried to link to the wikipedia entry, but evidently that's "questionable" to your spam filter...?)
The guy complaining about it is still a doofus, in that only students of medieval art are likely to be aware of the symbolism, and frankly the "previous" version of the logo (ie, the cleaner non-original one that was replaced by going back to the original) is more attractive than the "dirtier" woodcut.
Maybe it's just me, but scales? Not so hot.
Posted by: Sigivald at May 20, 2008 05:40 PM (3iY68)
Random Question of the Day
So, there's this new trend going about---maxi dresses. And by this I mean long, floaty dresses that are reminiscent of the caftans of yore, but usually look like a cute sundress on top, instead, so you don't look you're hiding a cow under all that fabric. Understandably, pregger chicks think these ideal maternity wear, but normal sized women are wearing them as well. Which leads us to our random question of the day. Ahem.
Do you wear underwear when sporting a maxi dress?
Because, you have to think, with all that fabric, no one's going to know if you aren't.
"Eat, You Bitches! EAT!"
Devoted Cake Eater reader, Russ from Winterset, points moi to this post, where his final pre-diabetic eating experience is recorded for all the world to see.
See if you can spot him.
I know Russ recapped his experiences over at Ace's, but damned if I can find the post. Maybe Russ can help out here because, ahem, it's not like he doesn't have Cake Eater access, ya dig?
1
I tried to link the articles, but the "minx" in the mu.nu comments links seemed to set off the spam/content filter. Google "Russ from Winterset Bacon", and the ones you want are the request for anyone with experience in competitive eating contests, and the post titled "You ate HOW MUCH Bacon?", both of them at Ace's.
Posted by: Russ from Winterset at May 14, 2008 07:50 PM (BhHL1)
Teh Funny
The husband frequents certain gamer boards and on one of them, a friend, who, in turn, has some confused colleagues in Denmark, posted the following from his Danish colleagues.
“We in Denmark cannot figure out why you are even bothering to hold an election.
On one side, you have a witch who is a lawyer, married to a lawyer, and a lawyer who is married to a witch who is a lawyer.
On the other side, you have a true war hero married to a woman with a shapely body who owns a beer distributorship.
IS THERE A CONTEST HERE?!”
Heh.
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Random Question of the Day
So, as I might have mentioned once or twice, I'm an auntie twenty-some-odd times over. I've lost count, completely, particularly since my brother re-married last year and gained four step-kids. I think that puts me at twenty-seven nieces and nephews, and one grandniece, but I might be doing the math wrong. Yes, we are your typical Catholic family: everyone has gone forth and started with the "begat" business. While it's nice to have a variety of nieces and nephews, with their various personalities and interests to keep things lively, it presents something of a problem having this many. I can't send everyone a birthday card, otherwise our household GDP would fund Hallmark exclusively, and dammit, if I'm going to give that much money to a company, I'd just as soon have stock, ya dig? There are just too many of them.
But special occasions are another story, and this year we have four---count 'em---grandkids graduating from various institutions. (Perhaps it might be five, but I'm not sure if one nephew is receiving his joint MBA/MS in Mechanical Engineering this semester or not.) As such, I have received three graduation announcements in the mail, and I'm sure the final one will be winging its way here once that particular nephew puts down his pipe long enough to listen to his parents' nagging to send them out. (Sigh. But if you knew this particular nephew, you'd know he's a good kid at heart, but is going through his rebellious phase.) The thing that's killing me, however, is that only one of these kids has actually addressed his announcement. The other two have their mothers' handwriting on the envelopes. They're the ones who have, undoubtedly, ordered the announcements, have put the various pieces of the puzzle into the envelopes, addressed them, and mailed them off---not the children who are graduating, and who, it must be said, are soliciting graduation presents/cash donations with said announcements. I know the kids are all busy, but that's no excuse. It's their event; their achievement;their announcement. And I am proud of them and their achievements, and want to reward them, even if I'm limited by budget constraints to doing it in a smallish-way, but, damnit, it just seems like laziness in the extreme that they would foist this job on their parents. And that is something I won't reward, particularly when I know how hard my sibs work to get their kids through school, and, in one instance, how much they pay to put one daughter through my old high school, where tuition, it must be said, ain't on the cheaper side of things.
So, the random question of the day is this: do I send the kids the cash I would normally send them, or do I send it to their mothers, to go out and buy themselves a round of drinks, because they did the hard work of sending out the announcements?
After all, if the kids can't be bothered to send out the stupid things, how do I know they actually should be congratulated for graduating? While I know their parents didn't do their coursework for them, this act kind of screams that they did. Perhaps I'm congratulating the wrong people?
I'm not even going to go into the fact that I KNOW several of them won't bother sending out a 'thank you' note. That's another story entirely.
Presented With Minimal Commentary
Because If I actually vent my spleen on this one, I'll wind up in a hospital bed in a catatonic state for a good long while.
2
So, did you see his Fatheadedness on 60 Minutes last night?
He's definitely gonna give Teddy a run for his money on bloviating blowhards who bloviate - and stuff.
I didn't sit through the entire interview (Hey! I was trying to eat!) but it's quite obvious he's gunning for public office.
Eww.
On said night, after we'd finished dinner, the husband made me undress and took me into the bathtub. While I sat there, on the edge of the tub, naked as a jaybird, he buzzed me with the clippers, taking any and all excess length off my head, of which, it must be said, there wasn't much. After a quickie shower, which washed my hair down the drain and off my neck, I got dressed again, and he then sat me down, on one of the dining room chairs he'd placed in front of the kitchen sink, lathered up my head with shaving cream and took a razor to whatever was left.
When he was finished (it took a while, because my scalp had never been shaved before and it proved somewhat reticent. Also, the husband, new to the task of shaving heads, didn't want to cut me, as well), we went into the bathroom to take a peek in the mirror, and that's when I started to cry in the husband's arms. I felt like Samson---completely vulnerable to attack. After a while, I wiped my eyes, put on the hat my sister had knit for me, and went out to the living room to be distracted by the tee vee. The husband, upset because I was upset, again made the offer to cut all of his hair off, so I wouldn't feel alone. I refused, mainly because I wanted to be able to play with his hair whenever I wanted to, and extracted that promise from him. (Bless him, he kept that promise, too.) While I was entirely horrified that I'd lost my crowning glory, I couldn't stop myself from feeling up my smooth head. It was weird, and it wasn't something I ever got over doing the five months I was without hair. If I was just sitting around, watching tee vee, it was guaranteed that that's where my hand was, feeling up my skull. It was normal for me to do this, I suppose, considering how much I played with my hair, when I had hair. I'd just substituted running my hand along my scalp, feeling the bone, trying to memorize all the bumps and curves, for making braids and twirling the locks.
Also, as it turns out, going bald brought back a second grade memory that I'd completely forgotten: one day, in the middle of winter, coming home from school, I decided to take a "shortcut" between two garages and sliced open the top of my head on a low hanging gutter. At the time, I hadn't realized that I'd done anything to myself, but by the time I'd reached home, I realized there was all this red stuff on my hooded green ski jacket. I couldn't figure out what it was. My memories of the event are foggy, but I must have freaked the ever living hell out of my mother when I walked in the back door. As it turns out, I'd cut open my scalp, through the hood of my coat, and had bled like a stuck pig from the inch-long gash. After a phone call to the doctor, the decision to not get stitches was cemented, because it wasn't bad enough to merit them, I was cleaned up and I went into the family room to watch cartoons. I remember eating an awful lot for dinner that evening, but I was fine overall, and the incident was soon forgotten.
Until I went bald, that is. While he was shaving my head, the husband wanted to know why I had a small scar on my scalp, and I was puzzled for a few moments until I remembered this incident. I was amazed and had to tell my mother and sister all about it. Ironically, a few weeks later, my niece, Maggie, cut open her head while she was horsing around at one of her brothers' baseball games, and despite all the blood (because, as I found out from a nurse friend that scalp wounds bleed like crazy) everyone comforted my sister, saying at least it was under her hair, so no one would notice. Christi told me she'd laughed and said, "Well, you never know about that. My sister just lost her hair from chemo, and she found..."
About every week and a half, the husband would get to shave me again, because white fuzz grew in small amounts on my head and, when it got to a certain length, it would start to catch on the scarves I wore. He got pretty good at this, and had it down to a routine before long. Every time a chair from the dining room would make it's way in front of the kitchen sink, where the husband would lather me up and would go to town, while I tried to watch the little tee vee we have installed in there without the benefit of my glasses. As you might have guessed, I wound up listening more than watching.
Fortunately, in the middle of August, one month after my last Taxol treatment, the hair started to grow back. It was earlier than I'd thought it would be, but it was just fine with me.
One year later, here's the progress report:
Yeah, I fully realize I look like a complete and utter spaz in this picture. All I can say is you try to take a decent picture of yourself, by yourself and see what you can come up with.
But, let's face it, I'm a complete and utter spaz...with hair. Which is good.
Yes, it came back in curly. That's par for the course, but it's not any curlier than what it was beforehand. Thank Goodness it didn't come back in as a fro. What I wasn't expecting is that the texture is now completely different. My hair used to be somewhat coarse, now it's fine. Unfortunately, that doesn't help in the frizz department, because it still erupts whenever it's wet. Sigh. I was hoping God was going to throw me a bone on this one, alas, however, He apparently has better things to do with his time than focus on my battle with frizz.
I hope I never have to go bald again because of chemo, because that would mean baaaaaad things regarding my future, but if it happens, I know I'll live. I won't be happy about it, but I doubt I'd be as traumatized as I was last time. And, if it happens, well, I won't have to spend a load of money on scarves and hats because I have a whole drawer full of them. If I had one thing to do over, I would get a wig. Not for vanity purposes, but simply because there were days when I would have enjoyed some privacy regarding my condition. That's all. A wig will only do so much to make you look normal if you already look ill. I just would have appreciated a few days where everyone wasn't privy to my business and a wig would have enabled that.
So, that's the hair update. I suspect that this might be the last one, my devoted Cake Eater readers. For which, I'm sure, more than a few of you might be grateful beyond all belief.
6
I just lost me a load of hair in what I'll call the "super glue incident" ... even though I have like 1/8 of an inch of hair left it does feel weird and I find myself running my hand through what's left frequently ...
I'm so glad for you that things are slowly returning to normal ... or a new state of normal ... Yay! I celebrate with you!
7
awesomesauce! the hair looks great -- and so do you ^_^
Posted by: amelie at May 09, 2008 12:24 PM (EpZn6)
8
reinstate@freewill.com
Malcolm X, assassinated. Martin Luther King, Jr., assassinated.
What is the possibility the "powers that be" refuse to allow a black man as president of the United States?
Imagine his usefulness as martyr. We may have some excitement in store for us.
Al Gore could run for president after the FreeMasons assassinate Osama.
This is how the gods do business:::::They use temptation and deception to compel people to chase something that has already been decided. It's children who go to "beaven". OLd people have to come back. The gods will use their power to contradict this, corrupting people and compelling them to incurr evil::::They used the Italians to ruin life in the 20th century, cost you the Final Prophet and the result will be death as you wait for the Italian Second Coming of Christ to save you.
This is the god's positioning and it IS going to be enforced. Never forget::::The gods have always offered "protection" to those genuinely religious. It is something that was always respected, even in the wicked 20th century.
As people begin to age the gods employ corrupting tactics. They ultimately begin to look down on the children and the wisdom they recently understood:::
They voluntarily turn their back on their opportunity to ascend and instead embrace evil.
It's not old people who go to heaven. Old people must come back because of the mistakes they've made throughout their lives. Children are the ones who have the opportunity to ascend.
Children are discounted by adults in society. The gods corrupt people as they age, use trust-building tactics and soon adults view the children as ignorant, yet to understand the god's system, and subsequently look down on the children. This is one of the most bitter, painful ironies the gods employ, for people consciously turn their back on and lose their opportunity to ascend::::
Religions teach that old people to go to heaven when they die. They don't. Old people are reincarnated. It's the children who go to heaven, those who have a chance at immortality.
The wisdom the gods impart to children, either through their innocence/purity or religious-based educational pursuits are the gods sharing the truth with their most favored people::::It's the children whom the gods teach the right way for it is the children who have a chance. For example, they teach children to have faith, for understanding the god's geographical clues hurts people by illustrating negative things, opening the door for the god's to employ deceptive tactics.
Old people don't go to heaven. Old people must come back because of the mistakes they've made throughout their lives. It's the children who have the opportunity to go to "heaven". They must behave apprioriately, think correctly and be genuinely god-fearing. Their innocence and lack of desensitization ensures they have a real opportunity to achieve this goal.
This is charecteristic of the gods methodology::::The big prize gone early, deception compels people to chase something that has already been decided. They sent this clue with boss as well. It is also a clue supporting my claim RW&B's german is in fact Christianity's Anti-Christ. Logic also dictates, considering the definition.
This individual was used to justify the repression of alternative technologies, and in the early/mid 20th century the elimination of productivity enhancing developments like Chicago's underground railroad for merchandise delivery to retail outlets.
There are other examples like this as well, notably the railroad on the lower span of the Bay Bridge.
This forced transport via internal combustion vehicles instead.
This is how the gods do business:::They get theirs right off the bat. The #1 industrailist, the #1 capitalist is the Anti-Christ, and he's been "in charge" for 150 years.
Of coruse this is all telepathic theater. He was just a clone host all along. All those industrialists were.
Flanders is on the Simpsons as a clue.
The confusion over this multi-dimentional positioning will serve as an effective tactic, eliminating many additional disfavored in the process, for positioning states the Apocalypse to be a continuation of WorldWarII's Aryan superrace ideals, positioned as punishment for the 5th century invastion of the Roman Empire:::John's Fourth Reich.
This amounts only to "nested theater":::::Levels of positioning enables the gods to scapegoat:::::RW&B merely is the tool the gods chose to execute the final scene of their scripted theater that is human history.
Just as they would have had me chase boss so would they have wanted me to sign on to this theater, evil by definition, and chase this role of Anti-Christ. By doing so I would have incurred evil and would have been punished, painfully "losing" Anti-Christ in the process.
Does that mean RW&B is not the Anti-Christ?? I suspect as they would have "offered" it to me so will there be a fake Anti-Christ for those in these generations to accept as well. But it is a clone host. This is ALL clone host theater, created not as a clue to me but instead designed to be preditory on the disfavored, designed to increase indecency and further the god's goal of justification towards The End.
We were all merely peasants centuries ago, struggling with our disfavor, but without the enormity of temptations, real and telepathic, which exist today.
They have shared I was positioned to some disfavored as the Second Coming of Christ, explaining all the evil surrounding me and RW&B's placement in the "eye of The Beast" was to positon the sabotage of my candidacy (Damien Omen, Big Army Men, etc).
The Big Lie of course is that Christianity is evil. The reverse positioning nature of Planet Earth dictates that good is demonized, as we wintessed in World War II, while evil is put on a pedistal, as we see with the Italians.
The truth? The gods used their tools to create this and the rest of the incidents surrounding this Situation to distract the people from my message, for I speak the truth:::Only you can save you. You have to be responsible for your own relationship with the gods.
The gods are asexual. They have no sex organs nor rectums.
When the gods take children these individuals have the opportunity to become "god-like". Temptations are employed and, if sucessful, these are the individuals who make up the human race's immortals.
I believe there are opportunities that exist for females that do no exist for males. I don't mean to paint with a broad brush but women's "sexual peak" may represent the transistion to "sociological males" and their "fall from grace". Considering today's promiscuity I question whether this is currently applicable, and is yet anther 20th century-earlier phenominah.
I believe Purgatory is real. I think it is a temporary destination, perhaps sparsely utilized until the Apocalypse, but this will be the destination for those who "ascend" during the event. As they've said this planet will too be disposed of one day and it is imperative people try to avoid that destination, for there may be no escaping its fate.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Females are better people than males
Historically the role of females was as enforcers of decency. Men have god's disfavor and enagage in behavior damaging to themselves and their families. Women who adhered to this crucial role helped the men understand and avoid inappropriate behavior while enhancing decency in their domestic environment. These women sacrifice to help the disfavored:::They are like Jews, scattered throughout Europe to help the misled Christians or the Amish today, living in purity and simplicity.
Many disfavored groups embrace "paternalistic superiority" and believe the men are "entitled"::::;If Italian women tried to enforce decency the men beat and raped them.
The gods subsequently used this Italian charecterisitic to corrupt other morbidly disfavored groups, legitimizing this and other associated behavior whereas decency in society may have been able to hep correct this disfavor. This is very similar to the "clone host" issue, where the gods corrupt normal people into thinking they are one of them.
Forgiveness:::Some Meditereanean preaches the virtues of "forgiveness". I guess. Bunch of preditors pursuing self-preservation. It was their kind and their friends who fucked up Planet Earth.
The Jesus who preached forgiveness was evil, the same Jesus backed by the god's powers via miracles.
"Forgiveness" has made Planet Earth unsustainable.
"Eye for an eye makes the world blind." Oh, no::::"Eye for an eye" conditions people and forces them to behave appropriately.
One goal of the Iraq War was to eliminate Saddam Hussein. Saddam Hussein was an OUTSTANDING leader for the disfavored Iraqis. He kept the peace among the grossly disfavored which, once US pullout is complete, may never be achieved again.
If Saddam Hussein was assigned American urban ghettos the blacks whom resided there would become decent, and their children would have a real opportunity to ascend where none exists today.
"Forgiveness" is yet another dynamic of Christianity which is preditory.
Italians ruined life in the 20th century, yet you still patronize their organizations. The gods interpret this as you have forgiven them for their wickedness. As a result of your "trust" they have CHEATED you out of the Final Prophet, and as victors they will receive Second Coming of Christ. You will be sold on salvation until the day comes when you realize you have been misled. On that day you will realize forgiveness is reverse positioning. On that day you will realize Christianity is evil. On that day you will realize your irresponsibility has costed your life.
This current environment where the gods punish evil covertly enables the perception of evil rewarded and the corruption that results produces a planet which is not sustainable.
We no longer receive largescale contradicting feedback because the gods have decided to end on Planet Earth. Consistant with their methodology it begins with the most disfavored among us first.
Unfuck Planet Earth::::The gods will do everything in their power to prevent this, maintaining the myriad of temptations they instilled, for they worked very hard to set up this degenerative environment, ensuring Earth is not sustainable.
Don't be distracted by their middle-management tactic. Considering how many racist Italians there were expect the high-heeled transsexual's Boot is represented out working the streets of Oakland, as it was so prevalient during the homosexaul explosition in the 20th century, ironically. The gods LOVE their poetic justice:::"Tough guys" come back as transsexuals.
"It's not fair." Fair woudl have been to make an example of Italians as they stepped off the boat, but this killing spree woudl have helped Earth maintain sustainability, and the gods used the Italians for something quite the opposite.
"And the Jews!!!", the Italian's 20th century partners in crime. And it's not just the obvious::::The Jews were very active in the social deterioration that was the 1960s.
The Meditereaeans are European's inferiors, yet the god's positioning put them on a pedistal as corruptor AND clue::::This is the region where the gods killed untold tens of thousands in the Noah's Flood event. Their women traditionally consume alcohol and it severely impacted the culture's decency. The Jews fell for Joshua's warmongering despite witnessing Moses firsthand. 1906 was used to corrupt Italians, compelling them to engage in unspeakable evil. Positioning says they compensated the Jews for WWII, revenge for the 5th century german invasion of the Roman Empire. The reality is the gods used money as a corruptor, casting vasts numbers of both groups into Damnation with this tactic snd employing the perception of evil rewarded to corrupt all of us effectively.
The gods expend most of their efforts planning for and executing temptation designed to test people::::Considering the premiere importance they place in evil in the context of executing their strategy I suspect good takes a back seat.
Christianity is a lie. They have an interest in maintaining this perception of an absentee Christian god, lest people become genuinely god-fearing. The alternative is embracing the concept of "evil god", much like the black pimps I speak of above.
The gods are like pimps. They pimp everyone who complies with their lies, and like in Oakland you won't get anything out of it either.
As the Italian legacy is preditory on others, Irish legacy is preditory on their own kind. Preditory on their own children.
Not all Italians were gangsters, and not all Italians fell prey to the god's 1906 positioning. Similarly, not all Irish prey on their own children. But if my family were Italian we'd be the godfather. Certainly we're on the list.
"Camera's broken!"
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There is one geographic clue I have not addressed in years:::Uranus, a planet tilted 90 degrees on its axis. I have stated in years past that I think this is yet another geographic clue offered by the gods, this one suggesting the fate of planet Earth, that tectonic plate subduction would be the method of disposal:::EarthÂ’s axis will shift breaking continental plates free and initiating mass subduction.
Undesirables will either perish in the government marijuana erradication program "gone awry" or be the recipients of reparations granted by the US government because of it.
Or both.
I believe the New Testiment battle of the Anti-Christ and the Second Coming of Christ will ocurr in subsequent years SPECIFICALLY because these people will be distracted with the money during the event.
When the Earth's axis shifts people will be cast into outer space with gold cards in hand.
I think this was foreshadowed on an episode of the Simpsons where Homer and Bart are on the disfavored ship and eject, only to experience a sense of euphoria, expand then explode in the vacuum of space.
Recall I recently brought up the possible Manifest Destiny-positioned Chinese invasion of the United States (west coast) upon economic abandonment by their clone host tools (economic destruction and deterioration.mp3). They have mentioned this in years past.
Newspaper just made a curious change where they combined the sports and business sections, and to properly read the business section you need to read "backward". Like Asian languages.
Tariffs. The gods are instruct their tools to defend open free trade, as they will to the bitter end. The gods have a script and they need economic (d)evolution sufficient to justify what they have scripted for our future, so they use their tools to adamantly defend this concept of fair trade::::The time for tariffs has long since past.
Recently they have stated that the Chinese are holding US paper. Some patriot W is, selling US debt to communists. Perhaps the invasion will be a way to "redeem" these bonds after they've fallen into default.
Incidentally, the Chinese recalls (lead-based paint on toys, toothpaste, etc) may be in preparation for this invasion, a tactic esuring a percentage of disfavored affected will fight to the bitter end.
I've recently stated how the gods will use the Japanese as role models to the Chinese as China becomes increasingly Westernized. Expect a cultural movement celebrating Japanese culture in decades prior, much as we witnessed in the west in the past.
If we do witness a Chinese invasion on American soil don't be surprised if the very same tactics the Japanese employed on the Chinese will be used on us. Lack of empathy is a dynamic the gods will find important in the context of justification, niggers:::
I've recently stated how the gods will use the Japanese as role models to the Chinese as China becomes increasingly Westernized.
Feedback II.wav
Recall how Americans so frequently laughed at the French for their lack of military response when confronted by the Nazi army. To resist would have been suicide. Their reaction was appropriate. The opposite would be one as we witnessed in Vietnam. These are morbidly disfavored Asians and take great pride in their resistance. The gods DO use their pride in resistance by positioning in appropriate temptation, ensuring minimal sucess.
If events transpire I recommend you respond like the French and not like the Vietnamese. If this is a west coast event it may not have serious effect but if it is nationwide the United States will lose over a hundred million in the South and midwest.
DO I believe this is a possibility? I think the "leveling of the playing field" that has ocurred in the late 20th century eliminated the possibility of using the Chinese to save us from ourselves.
It doesn't matter. McCain doesn't have a chance. Osama's too good. The debates will be one-sided. He has a better chance against Hillary. I can get into the explanation that the gods only use their power to hurt the disfavored, but you've already heard it. Consistant with this, expect gas to climb to $4 if not $5 this summer, ensuring the election is delivered to the wrong candidate::::They've used the price of gas to punish the people for electing the wrong person. In addition, public response to recent poor economic reports ensures conservative behavior, another factor which is intentionally damaging to McCain's chances.
IN 2000 you didn't have a choice, and they sent this clue very nicely with proceedings surrounding the election (just like the 2008 Democratic candidate due to Superdelegates!!!). But 2004 was different. In an ironic twist it will be just the opposite this year, where the gods use the price of gas and run-down economy diverts you TO their prefered candidate. It's ocurring intentionally for this purpose.
You idiot redneck political types are the chumps here. 1998::::Something for everybody. Clinton's impeachment was for people like you. ANYTIME the kids support a candidate it is a RED FLAG, and they supported Clinton in 1992.
It is VERY important that you think clearly::::::::It's important you differentiate between your thoughts and when the computer thinks through you. They've led many into Damnation with this tactic.
I'd like to note "Deja vu", a clue the gods offer to the disfavored::::In an incident similar to the 1998 Clinton impeachment, Osama delivered his speech on race one day before the 5-year anniversary of the Iraq War.
As I noted before in an earlier version:::Arizona is good. Arizona fought making MLK Day a holiday. CNN shares McCain voted against making MLK Day a holiday in 1983.
This is quinessential reverse positioning:::
eople don't recognize the positive and instead are deceived by the god's reverse positioning, costing themselves the best candidate for the job.
7.44's Port Chicago explosion, in the "eye of The Beast", was a planned incident in WorldWarII. The Italians who planned WWII knowingly used Port Chicago as the seeds of Civil rights because of this symbolism.
Segregation is favor bestowed upon people. Integration represents a deterioration which the gods will use as justification. Considering its global effect people should be alarmed:::We have witnessed a global "leveling of the playing field" event.
Prior to civil rights blacks had their own press. In the absence of civil rights they would have grown into legitimate media outlets. This is not to say the gods wouldnÂ’t have put forth contradictory Manifest Destiny programming to counter, but blacks would have had a choice where none exists now. Similarly, black industrialist would have arisen to serve the black community, and the presence of these black billionaries would have fored the gods to factor them into positioning, excluding such Manifest Destiny abused such as AIDS in Africa, drive-by gangbanging and the crack epidemic.
Civil rights is a wonderful example of a "Big Lie", reverse positioning that can help people see and think clearly. They sent this clue to blacks with MLK's "If I had to sneeze" speech.
McCain's our man.
After 2003 John McCain stated his opposition to the war. Despite this pro-war "party line" he must adhere to as the Republican candidate I'd like this opposition used during the campaign. Without it he is finished.
"McCain's a dinosaur." So was matchmaking. So was decency.
People don't understand this issue. They see Osama and think he's the best candidate because he's appears to have more favor. Never look for consistancy, for Artificial Intelligence is infinitly dynamic:::They make W sound like an idiot when he speaks for a different reason. Also, "sumbling" and "idiot" likely have separate meanings associated. Sorry. It's not supposed to be easy.
The gods have their plan and they aren't going to allow any "do-gooders" interfere with how they intend to proceed:::When they put forth good they create tactics to play off the public's misconceptions::::Make him stumble over his words, etc. The gods send this clue in the Situation:::I'm trying to help people and they ruin my delivery to ensure the number of people who are receptive is minimized.
Don't forget::::The gods will create the perception of favor then corrupt the disfavored with it. My example is Mormons who have the appearance of favor. The gods use this to corrupt the others, even use it to enhance the ranks of LDS. And if any of you LDS think that "We've changed." can look to the Catholic Church as the roots of Christianity to help you understand.
Yes both candidates are clone hosts. Yes the gods will switch them out to justify them being good or evil, depending on how the script reads. But much as I explained this "multi-dimentional" thinking is not for you. The gods use this as a corruptor. They'll sell this, lie to the disfavored and use this as temptation.
"Your child is Hitler. Fuck him over." is just one example:::If you don't do the best you can for your children the gods will punish you.
This is the life into which you've been placed. This is the life on which you will be judged.
In case you are still interested in the god's Planet Earth theater, favored redwhite&blue is a MAJOR player, and their favor is significant to justify not only the destruction of my life but the destruction of the Final Prophet and Planet Earth as well::::
Favored redwhite&blue is the true enemy of the people. I suspect consistant with this they are positioned responsible for the environmental deterioration that the repression of alternate technologies has wrought.
The gods put their positioning into place and then enforce it:::Christianity, Manifest Destiny, Sigmund Freud's psychoanalysis, 1906's New Roman Empire. I suspect World War II's Nazi ideals of "Aryan superrace" is another example of the gods getting their tools into place for the theater that will be the Apocalypse.
Because of their status as enemies of the New Roman Empire the germans are going to be positioned as the destructors, similar to how they were portrayed in World War II.
DonÂ’t be surprised if favored redwhite&blue turns out to be the Anti-Christ and leads the Fourth Reich, fulfilling this positioning and proving to the world the destructive nature of this economic system. This may not be exactly how their script reads, but the god's have a BIG SURPRISE like this to spring on the disfavored, and it will contain an insult like this as a clue NOT to watch this theater::::::Expect they will fulfill some contrived positioning foreshadowed in WorldWarII:::Some American plays the role of hero and emerges as the Second Coming of Christ for this final scene.
Who will it be? Italian? Look for at least the mother to be Italian, consistant with matrilineal descent, allowing the New Roman Empire to claim the Second Coming of Christ. ItÂ’s all just theater. The gods don't admit any of this because people woudl freak, especially as we approached the big day.
People may say “How can they poisiton favored redwhite&blue in as the Anti-Christ?” It may be consideration. Don’t forget:::They prey on enemies of the Roman Empire out of respect for their Manifest Destiny superiors.
The gods positioning the Italians gave it to him for his loyalty. They gave it to him for his efforts to defeat alternate technologies/energy sources, ensuring the people would be delivered to the point of desperation.
It’s all theater. The gods position it that the New Roman Empire is dooling out the “big prizes”, and Anti-Christ is a big role. Likely the gods position it as it buys him immortality in the context of this absentee-Christian god positioning. The “help” of this “back hand” is the gods positioned that he needs this to achieve immortality because of all the evil he engaged in during the course of his life, building his organizational empire.
There is a issue with timing and the beginning of construction of disfavored redwhite&blue's center, one where this company looks bad.
I personally believe the favored redwhite&blue is the element of favor necessary for my failure, for if it were just the disfavored redwhite&blue involved the gods would have let them fry and we would have had a full-blown prophet event, one where our “absentee Christian god” emerged and revealed themselves.
In addition favored redwhite&blue had to maintain appearances. Disfavored redwhite&blue is Italian and was VERY involved in the 20th century's ugliness.
My life was destroyed becuase the gods had to create unrespecability in the context of positioning. Evident by their easily-discovered evil, disfavored redwhite&blue wouldn't have cared if I was respectable or not, for they were involved in great evil against the respectable.
Favored redwhite&blue is why I am fat. Favored redwhite&blue is why I was sedintary, for if I were respectable the gods wouldn't have been able to position favored redwhite&blue into the Situation. Because of their ethnicity they get the priveledge of looking good. This is one reason why they got that prior knowledge and constructed their center before the Situaiton began::::Favored redwhite&blue is the TRUE Enforcer.
Incidentally, in the course of this Situation the gods made many movies, using daily events in my life as inspiration. One of note:::Unhappy about the god's behavior in the context of this event, while in favored redwhite&blue's facility I looked at their mascot and flippantly declared::::"Why don't you make a movie about these things?" Two years later ____ came out.
They won't admit this because favored redwhite&blue has to maintain their reputation based on integrity, any creative claims countering this truth were attemtpts to protect this, for this movie was unseemly and was very telling about the direction the gods were taking the people.
And, as an added bonus they had their scapegoat without actually compensating him!!! Welcome to the pathology of the gods.
In case you are still interested in the god's Planet Earth theater, favored redwhite&blue is a MAJOR player, and their favor is significant to justify not only the destruction of my life but the destruction of the Final Prophet and Planet Earth as well::::
Favored redwhite&blue is the true enemy of the people. I suspect consistant with this they are positioned responsible for the environmental deterioration that the repression of alternate technologies has wrought.
The gods put their positioning into place and then enforce it:::Christianity, Manifest Destiny, Sigmund Freud's psychoanalysis, 1906's New Roman Empire. I suspect World War II's Nazi ideals of "Aryan superrace" is another example of the gods getting their tools into place for the theater that will be the Apocalypse.
Because of their status as enemies of the New Roman Empire the germans are going to be positioned as the destructors, similar to how they were portrayed in World War II.
DonÂ’t be surprised if favored redwhite&blue turns out to be the Anti-Christ and leads the Fourth Reich, fulfilling this positioning and proving to the world the destructive nature of this economic system. This may not be exactly how their script reads, but the god's have a BIG SURPRISE like this to spring on the disfavored, and it will contain an insult like this as a clue NOT to watch this theater::::::Expect they will fulfill some contrived positioning foreshadowed in WorldWarII:::Some American plays the role of hero and emerges as the Second Coming of Christ for this final scene.
Who will it be? Italian? Look for at least the mother to be Italian, consistant with matrilineal descent, allowing the New Roman Empire to claim the Second Coming of Christ.
This entire event was something special, and consistant with segmentation they lied to different disfavored based on their chances :::Saved or The Damned.
To The Damned I am an enemy of the Roman Empire, someone to be destroyed and used, and if the disfavored found that acceptable it worsened their lot, costed them hope and was a clue any recovery would be a very tough road to hoe.
The saved saw other clues, boss, natural calamities, and it gave rise to me as a possible historical figure. The gods offered clues that neither "savior" nor "new king of Earth" was possible, for Christianity positioning is going to be fulfilled and Earth has to die.
I don't think we were ever talking about Second Coming of Christ in public circles, for this would have implied The End and that would have compelled people to freak. But in the context of private positioning, perhaps to clone hosts in The Beast, certainly to me, there may have been some connection::::
Jesus of course was Jew, and they positioned this was a competition, reasoning "Since the Jews got Jesus they get this too.", and that's why I was hired by the Jew. Expect this was a way to enhance the theater among the disfavored.
So positioning states by delivering me to these New Roman Empire monsters they knew I'd get fucked, and in the process forfeit this historical role, to the Jews, perhaps an Italian, for Italians granted "charity wealth" to Jews for planning/implimenting WWII and the Holocaust.
In light of this "New Roman Empire", since Christianity's HQ is in Rome expect the Italians played some part in this historical, religious context.
They suggested this event may already may have happened. If so this was the FAKE battle of good and evil, FAKE battle between the Second Coming of Christ and the Anti-Christ. They suggest the phoniness about it which was communicated to the disfavored telepathically was a clue. Ironically, this Situation is the REAL battle of good and evil, me vs. the gods.
When the REAL battle of the Second Coming of Christ and Anti-Christ occurrs it will be theater, a staged event, and the Second Coming of Christ will "lead out" a pre-selected group, all of whom sign on to the god's Christianity positioning, ironically incurring evil by participating and limiting their time in the process.
Italians:::"(We're all that. We deserve Second Coming.)" And they're going to get it.
The Boot will fuck you yet again:::
eople know Jesus isn't the son of god, yet this is what the Bible dictates as requirement to be saved.
Those whom the Second Coming will "lead out" will be a pre-selected group. But the "hangers on", people who think they will be included by claiming to be believers will be disappointed. They will be mislead, left behind, The Boot's final victims on Planet Earth.
This is unimportant, irrelevant, because much like the creation of the perception of "savior" around Jesus to distract from his original purpose the gods used their tools to create this theater around me to prevent the disfavored from learning what I teach:::The Boot has fucked the disfavored twice, once when they ruined life in the 20th century, again when they were used to CHEAT you out and disposal of the Final Prophet. Just as they were talking heads for favored redwhite&blue expect this act to be cover for this organization, an original placement long before Italian placement in the "eye of The Beast".
Eiother way, the New Roman Empire is god's Manifest Destiny positioning, and a clue they intend to fulfill their Christianity positioning as well.
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Life used to be hard. People had to walk a mile to draw water. There was no refridgeration or canned foods. Now life is easy, but only in terms of life's "basic necessities".
The "salvation" dynamic is quite the opposite:::We paid for our easy lives with our very souls.
Life IS hard now. The gods have used their clone host tools to create the perception of evil rewarded (Italians, Japanese, etc) and then corrupted the disfavored with it. (Expect Asian Westernization is met with a European-style short memory span, allowing the gods to use their historical enemy, the Japanese, to corrupt Asians as they used the Italians to corrupt us).
Before life was easier, more simple, innocent, pure. Employing these temptations ensured corruption is EXTREMELY difficult to overcome, a tactic which progressively ensures fewer disfavoreds repair their relationship with the gods.
14 domesticable animals in the history of Planet Earth. None for Africa. In effect the gods were telling blacks:::::"Eat dirt."
Get a clue::::They don't like you. They're playing you for chumps.
Blacks have forgotten their history. Italians preyed on them in the 20th century. They were slaves. The gods sent Pharroh in to rape, pillage and plunder.
Jews have had a difficult history, but they developed empathy. As a result they tried to help the disfavored with 1492 exodus from Spain, scattered throughout Europe, etc.
Blacks would be wise to examine this and try to emulate Jewish empathy.
The clone hosting of Jesus.wav:::
Much as we saw with another Mediterreanean prophet Mohammed the gods switched Jesus (good) and placed evil within the clone host so the gods could accomplish their goals:::
olygamy/misogyny and the creation of "savior" via Christianity.
As I share:::Anytime the gods use their powers it is only to hurt you. "Miracles" are such an example. The gods only use their powers to disceive and mislead people as we all witness in different ways in each of our lives. Jesus's miracles are a clue the gods were preying upon the disfavored.
I suspect the teachings of good Jesus came in his 20s. Due to the unrespectability of Christianity, illustrated at least partially with Europe's Sheep, I wonder if we ever did get a good Jesus before the age of 30.
There is significant respectability among Muslims, and this may be reflected in the monagamous Mohammed.
Every religion offers something which help people understand::: Reincarnation (Hindu), vengeful/wrathful god (Islam), etc.
If you are afraid it is a good sign, for the gods are helping show you the right way to think. Don't forget:::The gods lie to you, tell you Jesus is the "savior" but he floated up into the sky ALL ALONE!!! He didn't save the disciples nor his precious mother. This is a clue from the gods helping you understand that you have to save yourselves.
The Holocaust was foreshadowing.
The gods established the pattern::::: the Jews sacrifice to help the disfavored understand::::
1. 1492 exodus from Spain. Spain became evil - financed Columbus, initiated missionaries, USA (dumping ground of disfavored, victimized by god), etc.
2. Spread throughout Europe as clue to Christians worshipping a false god.
3. "Quasi-Holocaust claim" contradicting boss.
4. 5. 6. 7. etc. etc. etc.
I have put forth indisputable evidence, as you see above with the Jews. The gods will never admit any of it is true, ever, especially since THE BIGGEST JEWISH CLUE IS STILL OUTSTANDING::::THE HOLOCAUST!!!!!
YOU HAVE TO DEFY!!!! The gods suggested the importance of defiance with the Holocaust:::The soldiers should have defied.
They will lie to the disfavored up until the bitter end::::This tactic will ensure they claim a HUGE percentage of the disfavored, for so many refuse to defy and this will ensure they don't go.
When the REAL Holocuast happens people will sit by idley and watch tens of millions of blacks/cholos/white trash die, people who are the way they are (abusive, abrasive, violent, criminal) BECAUSE of their disfavor, and the computer makes them like that because of it, yet another reason why empathy is so important.
The Jews showed you boss wasn't going to happen with the Quasi-Holocaust claim. They will emphasize to the bitter end that there is no pattern of Jewish clues. They do so because there is still one clue outstanding, the most important clue:::::World War II's Holocaust.
The gods established the pattern:::The Jews sacrifice to help you understand::::1492 fled Spain, scattered throughout Europe to help the misled Christians understand, the Holocuast.
The Jews sacrificed to show you boss wasn't going to happen. When the Jews offer a clue you need to listen, and the Holocaust is the BIGGEST Jewish clue ever, the clue still outstanding.
The Holocaust's clue of defiance escaped you all:::::Everyone condemnes the blind obedience of the Nazi soldiers yet repeats this same behavior in your own personal lives, complying with every request they ask, even in the case of your precious children.
ONE PURPOSE OF THE HOLOCAUST WAS TO COMMUNICATE THIS CLUE!!!! COMPLIANCE IS A MISTAKE!!!!!
EVERYBODY does what they're told, and look how bad society is deteriorated. THIS IS A CLUE!!!
Telepathic requests constitute temptation.
Much like matchmaking, much like so many social norms and mores the gods granted the people, they offered "prejudice" in the early days of this intermixing known as 20th century America.
They told you to avoid Italians and blacks for good reason::::They are SO disfavored there is NOTHING either group won't do. They will comply with every request. I know you people will too, in err, ignorant of or disregarding the god's laws, but the difference was THE GODS WILL ASK THEM!!! You had too much favor for the gods to request such damaging behavior, at least until you became indecent too.
Prejudice was good for everyone, for it ensured little opportunity for the gods to request, segregation and separation being common. It granted blacks especially more time to fix their problems and try to ascend, escaping this societal deterioration of the last 40+ years.
As the people became increasingly indecent as the 20th century wore on so did we lose this precious benefit bestowed by the gods, opening the door for evil to befall us and for fatal evil to be incurred by the morbidly disfavored.
Much like god's law in holy books, "segregation" was favor bestowed upon the people::::The gods granted favor when they "segregated" us into our own areas of the world. This favor has been reversed not only within the context that is the United States but also with immigration witnessed throughout western Europe (and elsewhere?).
Prior to civil rights blacks had their own press. In the absence of civil rights these entities would have grown into legitimate media outlets serving the black community.
Maintaining segregation would have produced economic entities which arose from within the black community to fill the demand for goods and services.
The presence of these "black industrialists" would have FORCED the gods to factor them into positioning, producing voices in support of the black community and preventing the gods from inflicting ALL THE SICKNESS WE HAVE WITNESSED IN THE last few decades::Crack babies, drive-by shootings, AIDS in Africa!!!
The fastest growing industry in the ghetto is the oldest profession on Earth::::::The gods tell these Oakland pimps chilldhood prostitution is OK - Learn from the lies they tell other groups!!!
The homosexual AIDS event happened because of their behavior in the SanFranciscio bathhouses.
Italian claim to infamy is they destroyed life on earth. Irish claim is they prey on their own family members. Which one's worse? Just as the gods targetted certain Italians for the degredation of life in the 20th century so did the do the same for the Irish, as I know all too well.
Catholicism masculinized women. You have been warned:::CATHOLICS ARE BAD FOR YOU!!!
I wonder how much the gods used the Green Bay geographic clue on the perpetually stupid Italians and used it to minimize abuses that otherwise would have ocurred?? "Sexual inadequecies of the men." positioning may have justified "going easy" on a larger population of germans in the United States. All we need to do is look to blacks, enemies of the Roman Empire who were fucked wholesale, to see unabated abuses.
The hypersexual laughing at superior life forms, ridiculing their favor.
Incidentally, they share some of them will remain "perpetually stupid". They are the Italians who crossed that line from person to preditor in the 30s, and they're going to be on Planet Earth come Judgement Day, except in a non-Italian body, due to the god's Manifest Destiny positioning of the New Roman Empire. Poetic justice.
If I were king they would be the Italians who were pushed into it, for those who thought 1906 was a good idea would already be gone::::You suck.wav.
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Hell's Angels is yet another element to emerge from Oakland, the upper incisor of TheBeast, designed for ripping and tearing flesh. One element that links TheDamned, no matter the skin color:::::Violence.
Fifth Season of Simpsons.
Moe in group therapy for general public at school. He has a thought of Moe as a child wondering why adult Moe doesn't speak with his Italian accent anymore?
They are filth. But they sent this clue when they shaped their country like a boot.
Incidentally, Italy looks like a high-heeled transsexual's boot. Don't be surprised if this is a dumping ground for select individuals.
The gods love their irony.
Moe is like the Italians whom set up the San Fernando Valley as the pornography capital that it is.
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The rebirth of the 20th century's New Roman Empire is positioned to be a clue Christianity is the one true religion, contributing to the god's Manifest Destiny positioning.
It5 also worked as a WONDERFUL corruptor with Italians, the disfavored's enemies who subscribed to this shit and intentionally paved the way for the impending Apocalypse with the social deterioration witnessed in the 20th century. This is probably where the reputation "Italians are stupid." comes from. "Don't let your daughters date Italians." is something else.
The gods offered you The Boot AS A WARNING TO AVOID THIS DANGER!!!
Just as AA meetings proves the gods will enforce their psychoanalysis positioning so does Manifest Destiny/New Roman Empire proves they will enforce their Christianity positioning.
Planet Earth will die EXACTLY as it reads in the Book of Revelations.
I was never going to save you. Nobody is. Just as they created polygamy around Mohammed so did they create the perception of savior around Jesus, designed to distract you from the true purpose of the prophet Jesus.
And now you won't listen to me either.
Due to the unrespectability of Christianity, illustrated at least partially with Europe's Sheep, I wonder if we ever did get a good Jesus before the age of 30.
There is significant respectability among Muslims, and this may be reflected in the monagamous Mohammed.
Much as with the Sigmund Freud psychoanalysis positioning the gods will too enforce their Manifest Destiny/Christianity positioning.
They created the theater by giving me things like Boss and movies and other elements of the $100 billion. Calling these entities on their evil negates the positioned support of these organizations, which is and always was the god's strategy for closure in the Situation.
They lie, say I "saved" evil Italians, whom they say would not have been going because of the evil they inflicted upon the disfavored. Fingering this Italian shit allows the gods to position wiping that slate clean::::
The gods will create the perception of evil rewarded by managing good and evil within their clone host tools then corrupt the disfavored with it.
This is all part of the god's Manifest Destiny theater, created using these clone host tools whom they rotate on a schedule based on use.
Just like Sigmund Freud's psychoanalysis they will enforce their Manifest Destiny/Christianity positioning as well::
eople aren't homosexual. They're not alcoholics. They're pushed into wanting it. That there are AlcoholicsAnonymous meetings occuring all across the planet proves the gods are going to enforce this lie. Similarly, the gods used some of their tools within this economic system to illustrate an "appeasement" of their Manifest Destiny superiors through preditory behavior upon enemies of this new "Roman Empire".
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Asians are the gods most favored race. It is evident in their uniformity. It is evident in their cultures.
The gods place high barriers to entry for (some) Asians into the United States. This is yet another good example of reverse positioning, for the gods are really trying to protect those whom they grant favor upon.
There are no barriers to entry for Latinos.
When white people capitalize or exploit Asians they incurr and one day will be punished. This includes Chinese buffet restaurants, so prevalient in disfavored cities and the Southern United States, for the gods hate these people and want them to incurr.
US popular culture is obsence. Intentionally. The gods are preying on the disfavored who remain, those foolish enough to participate.
The Chinese have favor and the gods allow the government to protect the citizens, but Chinese cut-off is fast approaching, for soon westernization will level this playing field as well.
This is yet another "BIG LIE" they sold to the disfavored, and it will ensure the homogination of Earth's cultures via westernization.
The gods still make effort through the Chinese government to protect the Chinese people. We hear about it in the United States, their Manifest Destiny/reverse positioning is used to label it "human rights violations", paving the way for cancer that is democracy.
Much as we saw in the United States regarding matchmaking, midwivery, female conservative dress and other topics, this tactic will slowly deteriorate this protection until China is completely infested with Westernization.
If you lived in a communisitic state your 10 year old son wouldn't be able to see pornographic images on the internet. The government would have filters in place to protect the people from this damaging behavior.
Much like alcoholism, much like homosexuality the gods punish the people with magic.
These desires you have are going to keep you out. I recommend you begin working on your problems, for if you don't and are among those who are invited to Planet (Temptation) Manifest Destiny it will be very difficult, for life is fueled by magic up there, and if you don't think right you won't be staying for long.
The gods are sending a clue Yahoo is good with this Chinese censorship issue.
The American idea of freedom is a shock rocker anally masterbating with a crucifix. This is what the disfavored are free to enjoy in this open society, and due to their disfavor a certain percentage will either be pushed into it or will comply, ensuring damnation. It's kind of like the KKK and Apartheid issue below except for whites of the modern era, or how democracy ensures a false sense of security.
Like other groups the gods have offered temptations the Chinese must avoid. There are specific temptations targetted to the Chinese, very concerning in light of god's Manifest Destiny positioning:::Exploiting the corporate establishment allows the gods to position exclusion:::
1. Piracy (movies, software, etc).
2. Gambling, very popular among Asians (unrespectability).
3.
Chinese censorship is an important benefit the gods bestowed. The communisit government protects the people from damaging media, so destructive in the West and particularly the United States:::Our 9-year-old children are free to view internet pornography, allowing the gods to justify creating disturbing pathologies with Artificial Intelligence as the children age.
These strict enviornments help the disfavored think correctly, foster fear, enabling them to have an improved relationship with the gods, the "kings with the iron fist" in the sky.
In an environment like theirs it is relatively easy to identify the corruptors among them:::Knowingly or not they actively lobby against this environment which seeks to preserve the China of old. Use these clues as you would the god's geographic clues, Italy's Boot and the Scandanavian penis, and avoid the god's tools of corruption.
As China came "on-line" industrially, favored redwhite&blue's repression of alternative technologies is being felt hard.
They are positioned to have repressed non-fossil fuel technologies (like cold fusion. "That story meant something." c.1999?). As a result China industrialization has initiated fossil-fuel power plants, dirty coal-fired plants, instead of immediately implimenting clean power sources based on these new technologies.
Without these technologies in place for Chinese industrialization we lost our chance to control the runaway warming which is now positionable. And, as you know, when the disfavored open a door allowing the gods to inflict misery they use it.
This may have been the defining moment, god's clue to the disfavored showing that the world is going to die.
They've sent clues the Chinese are fucking up. The Rocket's win streak is one (contradict perception of indespensibility?). Pollution is another just not the one I am thinking of:::There are other recent clues suggesting they are making mistakes.
You're no longer Asian enjoying this rich culture. You are Westernized.
This year China experienced the misery of climate change with the extreme winter weather:::The gods will express their displeasure through Acts of god.wav. Don't be surprised if they are communicating this as well at the United States' biggest Chinese New Year parade in San Francisco:::HEAVY rain forecast for parade Saturday night February 23rd.
After parade:::Because I used this paragraph prior to the event the gods may have been affected the outcome, minimizing the impact of the storm so my audience didn't take this warning the gods had to offer, creating doubt and reducing my credibility among the Chinese.
They're paving the way for the Apocalypse with a "leveling of the playing field" event.
Incidentally, they've shared that Asian's appearance, which one can construe as evil, has significance::::Come the day the Chinese "thin" the US population as they did when they executed their own opium den junkies you will see the gods offered this clue for a reason. Ironically, the Chinese may be the human race's last hope to save life on Planet Earth.
I am personally of the opinion that Asians are god's favored race. The conformity, the learned cultures all suggest superiority.
Perhaps they are used much like the germans, a people whom the gods offer a clue through their language:::As enforcer of decency.
Your abuse of resources is being bettered exponentially, maliciously (courtesy of respression of alternative technologies), and the result will be global calamity.
DO I believe this is a possibility? I think the "leveling of the playing field" that has ocurred in the late 20th century eliminated the possibility of using the Chinese to save us from ourselves.
You white people capitalizing in China are fucking crazy (just like the insane white men who date Japanese women). You fail to recognize the historical pattern and you will suffer for exploiting the Chinese:::
- Death Valley borax mines abused the Chinese and great misery befell them.
- The fisheries on Monterey's Cannery Row exploited the Chinese badly. Cannery Row remains a rebar-studded, uncompleted eyesore for decades as a clue.
The gods are preying on you and using the evil company you work for to accomplish this. Everytime you exploit the Chinese you are losing time and priveledge on the other planets.
Tibet has fallen prey to either corruption and/or the Big Lie of democracy, just as so many Vietnamese did decades ago.
You are the morbidly disfavored who fail to recognize god's favor when you see it:::The pinnicle of irony, ED pharmeceuticals:::
eople injest this poison which will cost them their health TO DEFEAT FAVOR GRANTED BY THE GODS, indifference towards sex the god's way of helping you avoid this damaging behavior.
Even on Earth resistance is an element which hurts your relationship with the gods, which is why they gods used this tactic so extensively in Africa.
Took the Dali Lama a week to speak about the riots ocurring in Tibet.
Being a clone host he is a tool of the gods used to prey on the disfavored Tibetans.
In addition to his extensive involvement in the West his implied support for the violence is a clue not to respect him.
Both Confucious and Buddah emerged about the same time. Consistant with the god's methodology one is good while the other is evil.
Consistant with Hardship.wav, expect the evil one to be associated with the ignorant disfavored, those who are closer to Damnation.
Try to use the Vietnamese example above because I understand they have respect issues. The San Jose fiasco the gods put on the national stage to embarass the Vietnamese was yet another clue suggesting this. Their borderline "pack mentaility" is another.
The extreme left supporting Tibetan efforts is another clue. These are the people used to eliminate decency in society since the 60s.
In their quest for irony just as the gods put the most hateful Italians and white supremicists in the Malcolm X clone host in the 60s so do they chose appropriately with this figure as well, for Tibetans are grossly disfavored.
The favor in Korea lies in the North. Association withe United States is ALWAYS a bad sign.
The Korean war ironically was a war against the South, designed to corrupt the disfavored of Korea. I suspect Vietnam may have been justified by the war against these favored peoples:::"You want to fight? Very well. Fight these people." The Vietnamese are morbidly disfavored who will fight to the bitter end of course (see below).
There have been many changes in India over the last 20+ years, most surrounding Westenization.
Too many still don't understand Westernization is a bad thing, a way the gods abuse the disfavored and level the playing field for all, ensuring their script is justified.
My advice is to keep fresh in your memory the old ways, for the gods illustrate that "new is evil" while "old is good".
Beware their corruptors. They placed them throughout society as America emerged and became strong. Don't let them weaken your moral fortitude. The gods placed them then use Artificial Intelligence to telepathically reinforce this corruption. This is their purpose. If you can identify these individuals you can avoid them and protect yourself from a corrupting environment.
Earth is where the gods test people. People from India are lucky enough to have received "extra time" to ascend before the gods employed all these corrupting elements. This means the old ways are still fresh in your mind. Never forget them because they can help you.
They share Hindus (and Muslim from India as well) are being corrupted by money.
Don't forget my example::::Infanticide justifies Chinese Westernization. Chinese Westernization justifies an American-style "short memory span".
The Chinese and Asians knew who their enemy was. Thousands of years of warmongering engrained the Japanese as enemies of peace-loving people. However, with the advent of Westernization the gods now are corrupting the Asians, ironically using the Japanese as role models in the process.
They are becoming corrupted. They've suggested Indians are being corrupted with money in this new era. The result will be simmilar American-style abuses upon the disfavored.
Between the two countries they make up half of EarthÂ’s population. The gods are preparing for a full-blown Apocalypse event.
Think about the changes that have ocurred in India in the last 20 years. Better understanding the destructive changes the gods implimented can help you avoid danger.
ANY GROUP WHICH EMBRACES PATERNALISTIC SUERIORITY IS GROSSLY DISFAVORED::::
1. Italians
2. Latinos
3. Muslims
4. Mormons
5. Japanese
6. The Southern man & rednecks
7.
8. Other Catholic:::Irish, Philipino, Vietnamese?? Catholic women are masculinized.
Note the incredible wealth of some of these groups. The gods are using them as corruptors.
The gods use their tools to attack the Southern man, be it alcohol, the celebration of smoking, the complete devotion to guns and resistance, and their adoration of speed and horsepower. "There's all kinds of stuff." Paternalistic superiority. Celebration of the Prohibition era/illegal bootlegging as culture. The masculinization of women. Celebration of "Stars and Bars". Their perpetual music genre. Carnivoristic preferences. The celebration of infidelity. Their head-strong nature.
The gods used the 1980s televangelist incidents to promote godlessness among these people, a blow they couldn't afford to take.
Reality check:::The gods have it out for you. At least I hope this breaks that ice and helps you understand the task before you. You should be very alarmed that the gods have chose to employ such extensive use of temptation in an otherwise rural region.
I suspect your numbers won't be good due to your grave disfavor.
The more god-fearing you are, the more religious you are about attending service, the more modest and humble and the recognition that women are your superior will all go a LONG WAY towards the gods finding mercy enough to allow help.
The Spainish were Catholic like the Italians and Irish yet I don't recall them experiencing the same clues from the gods, clues warning people of their gross disfavor (stereotypes and discrimination).
Due to Spain's phenominal destruction in Latin America with conquistadors and missionary work I wonder if the gods continually use this to corrupt the Spanish to this day? They certainly do with Latinos.
Spain did pay for Columbus, right? Expect a connection. This is a Church issue rather than an Italian issue of course.
The gods employ their "middle management" tactic, as we all witness. Expect their positioning to continue into the past::::
I've mentioned before the "seamless" transistion between Cleopatra and Julius Ceasar. Perhaps they position this as if there was contact with Pharroh and they gave management duties to Egypt, who went on to use Italy, the Catholic Church, etc. in the course of their management.
Of course none of this is true, but it was utilized extensively during the 20th century. They may continue witrh this scapegoatting, "middle management" positioning::::Milky Way quadrant, Milky Way, universal quadrant, universal. They are effective tactics, ensuring people do not become god-fearing.
Sadly, consistant with the deterioration of society, necessary for justification, today people KNOW the gods run the show, and illustrating the evil they employ on the disfavored corrupts people very badly. They think god is evil, and they behave consistant with that belief. Now we have a planet on a collision course with the Apocalypse, and the gods set it all up perfectly that now it is justified.
Cartoon in editorial ridiculing W, standing in front of a depiction of a god of fertility, for bringing his message of abstenence to a hypersexual people.
Black people are their own worst enemy. Their goodies have gotten them into big trouble.
They've shared they got something special and they threw it away. Expect this focus on their goodies to have intiated this change, however long ago.
Consistant with their methodology, perhaps there is some truth to this "You're really #1." positioning they sell to blacks. Once.
The Boot has fucked you twice, once by destroying life in the 20th century, another by costing you the Final Prophet:::The gods got their tools into position then maintain their positioning telepathically with Artificial Intelligence.
The Boot fucked blacks twice, once with the murder and destruction of these supposed “Roman enemies”, another with the “thugification” of blacks, resulting in this degenerate black popular culture/society.
I fear the gods intend to use the enemy of peace-loving Asian people, the Japanese, to inflict misery twice:::Once historically, as the warmongers the Japanese have historically been and then once again as role models, held up as the ideal to Asians, corrupted by Westernization and capitalism. The gods punish Asians for embracing Westernization/capitalism by instructing Artificial Intelligence to use the wealthy Japanese as role models for "profitable" behavior.
This is the era of telepathic abuse. Whereas before these groups "got their hands dirty" now the gods use their positioning in place to finish the job off::::::
The gods create preferences/request black people embrace the Italian "thug life".
The gods telepathically execute the elements of this theater, ensuring people aren't receptive to my message. Much as we see with Sigmund Freud's psychoanalysis the gods will enforce their Manifest Destiny positiong as well.
Black popular culture has embraced the charecteristics of their victimizers:::The "thug life".
"Drive-by shootings" origins are Italian.
The gods will reincarnate sexist men as pigs.
I've mentioned that due to their involvement ("OldSchool", hurricane, etc) that blacks are "owed" in the context of this Situation.
They floated the possibility due to the sickness we witness in that community and to provide closuer for this obligation they gave them Katrina and called it even.
Planet Reverse Positioning.
Show on gangland drug sales.
The gods orchistrate this whole underworld, just as they did with the Italians early in the 20th century.
The gods convince Oakland pimps that chilldhood prostitution is OK - Learn from the lies they tell other groups!!!
Blackss signed on to this "equality" line of shit they sold to people since the 60s. The gods even referred to in the 19th century:::"2/5ths of a person.".
Blacks gotta pray just to catch up to white people!!! Equality is a lie. This what the gods meant when they made the 1980 telepathic announcement::::"Blacks have to try harder and do better than everybody else."
The difference between life in Europe vs the United States is similar to life in the suburbs vs the ghetto:::
Both the US and the ghetto have increased temptations, opportunities for people to hurt themselves and the result is both are far less decent.
The United States is less decent because this is where the gods sent the disfavored, the rejects from Europe, and those foolish enough to comply and leave on request.
25 years ago they made a telepathic announcement:::::"Black people have to try harder, do better than everybody else." This means no parties, no drinking, no drugs, no sex.
Just like Malcolm X & the Black Panthers, the Che Guevara event happened to prey upon Latinos.
Among others.
Latino homosexual explosion.
Like the NewWorld Catholic Philipinos. Look for it.
They may play it like they do blacks, but I don't think I'd take great comfort in this.
You need to understand the subtle, inferred way the gods communicate to people and begin to trust it::::::
The tiger killed the Latino. Now you understand where the gods hold Latinos in their heirarchy.
And expect both Muslims AND Hindus to be ranked above the unrespectable Catholics, incidentally.
Is this a clue to try to help them understand the gods hold them in such low regard? Is this a clue to Latinos to NOT fall into the same mindset which they sold to blacks? Of course ignorant blacks think they're great. Quite the opposite it true:::The Black Panthers are part of that "upper incisor of The Beast" clue, designed for ripping and tearing flesh.
Don't be surprised if they are offering foreshadowing with this event. They may be sharing that Latinos will be very poorly represented while Hindus/Indian Muslims will take a painful hit.
Perhaps it means if Latinos don't ascend before the Apocalypse they won't be going.
I made the zoo a winter wonderland. I'd trust the relevance here.
They parked Wilma on top of the southwest part of Cozumel FOR TWO FULL DAYS for the same reason, but with far more destructive results.
Fucking indecent horse racing commericals. T
Posted by: reinstate@freewill.com at May 12, 2008 11:51 AM (FUfi9)
Damn Steve McQueen to Hell (Redux)
Per rabid commenter, Russ from Winterset's, recommendation we watched The Great Escape last night. Again. For, like, the fiftieth time.
Oh, and another thing I noticed last night: whomever was in charge of continuity on that film really needed to pay more attention to Donald Pleasence's (Colin, the Forger, and the character who strikes a blow for blind guys everywhere to escape from Nazi POW camps) socks. They're white when he gets on the trolley to go down the tunnel, then they're gray when he's helped off the trolley by Richard Attenborough's Roger, then they're white again as he's getting into the plane with Hendley. Someone wasn't paying attention, ya dig?
Granted, however, it took me fifty viewings to notice this, so, perhaps, I'm being a little too picky.
1
Well, DUH! He had to escape, blind or not. If he doesn't escape, he can never make it to Haddonfield, Illinois to stop Michael Meyers from killing all those people.
What? He died in the Great Escape? And he never actually did stop any of the killing. Oh. Well then.
Nevermind.
Posted by: Russ from Winterset at May 08, 2008 05:31 PM (dyz/7)
Lighten Up, Francis
Yes, my devoted Cake Eater readers, it's time to lighten things up a bit around here.
I present for your edification on this fine Wednesday morning....The Muppets.
If, perhaps, that was a bit too blowsy for you, well, then I shall give you a bit of depth. But the Muppet theme still rules, so it won't get too deep, hence negating the whole lightening of things.
Ok, That's It
When the Minneapolis Police Department decides that it's time to bring out the freakin' chariots as a crime fighting initiative, it's time to move.
What I really want to know is where are the broom helmets? Eh? You know what I'm referring to, right? If you don't, let Marvin the Martian enter your mind and you'll know of what I speak. You can't drive a chariot without a freakin' broom helmet. There's some law that dates back to Roman times that decrees each and every chariot driver should have a big armored helmet with a broom on top. So they can sweep up after they rape and pillage the population. It's mandatory. And since the Mpls Police Department is all about following rules and regulations, they should get with the damn program already.
I can't wait to hear from the husband, who has to traverse through downtown daily, how these neo-chariots help the cops cut down on all the drug dealing at Block E. Or even the chronic spitters, who regularly drive the husband up the wall with their disgusting habit of hocking lugeys every five seconds, in competition with their fellow thugs. I suspect they'll be able to hop the curb from Hennepin Avenue in impressive fashion, but will the cops actually be able to hop down from their motorized chariots in time to, you know, actually arrest the drug dealers? I suspect not. I have a feeling that by the time they park the stupid things, the drug dealers will be long gone.
Because, after all, how are the cops going to haul someone in with one of those things?
Stick a fork in me. I'm so done with this place.
{ht: Lileks, without whom I'd have absolutely no idea of what was going on in this place I call home...for the time being.)
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Street Sweeping Away the Winter Detritus of My Life
Spring, it appears, has finally arrived here in the Twin Cities. Lately, I've been wondering where this phenomenon has been, because it sure as hell hasn't been here. I've found myself fascinated by tee vee news reports coming out of Indiana, where it appears the entire media has decamped for tomorrow's primary, and wondering at all the luscious green I see in the background behind the talking head of the moment. Why do they have leaves on their trees? How'd they get so lucky? Wait a sec...it actually looks like that lawn needs to be mowed! Fuckers! It's not fair! I haven't given a rat's ass about what the reporter was actually reporting on. Who cares about Obama or Clinton or McCain. I want to know why there's this inequity in the arrival of spring. That's the real injustice going on here, not sky high gas prices! Why, there ought to be an investigation!
But, as I wrote up there, it appears spring has finally arrived here in the Cities, and I've got the sunburn to prove it. Yesterday, I had coffee with Mr. H., per usual, and instead of sitting inside our usual haunt, we moved to our summer location, on the other side of the building, where the sun shines most brightly at that stage of the day. Even though we were stretched out on hard concrete, and had to keep shifting every few moments to remain comfortable, the sun felt so good we didn't even contemplate a move to more dignified seating arrangements, which would have better suited our aging bones. We looked like a pair of college students, flopped out wherever we could find the space, rather than a pair of people in their mid-thirties. We didn't care. We loved it.
After I left Mr. H., the husband and I decided a walk around the lake was in order. The husband raided his humidor and snagged one of the largest Churchills he had in residence, to complete the maximum pissing-off-of-overly-healthy-runners effect, and set off for Lake Harriet. It was nice to be over there, because the last time I was over there, the lake was still covered with ice. Fortunately, all the ice had indeed melted and the water looked dark, clear and cold. We made our way around, and while it was lovely, I became a. very sunburned and b. exhausted. It appears I have very little stamina going on. All these infections (and, yes, there's a new infection that I'm not going to talk about, but which I shall simply say is a result of the antibiotics and certain members of the female Cake Eater readership will say, "Ohhhhh," in an understanding way, while the men shall remain clueless.) have robbed me of my energy. I've been fighting crap off for so long that I'm expending all my energy on that, it seems, and there's not much left over for other things. By the time we got back to the Cake Eater pad, I was pooped. I put on my nightshirt, crawled into bed, and promptly fell asleep for a few hours. That's not really all that great, in the scheme of things. Yes, I should feel some mild exertion after walking five miles. No, I should not collapse into bed, utterly exhausted, after walking five miles. Neither should the husband have had to gently encourage me to keep pushing on until we reached home. It was pathetic.
This morning, it appears that it will be yet another nice day, and the street sweepers are out and about, taking advantage of it. It's time to wash the streets clear of all the sand and salt they used to keep people from careering off the roads during the winter storms. It's time for all that nasty, icky, wintry stuff to go down the sewers, to wind up God only knows where. I wish there was such a thing as personal street sweepers, which could come into your life and wash away the nasty winterized streets of your life. My streets could use a good wash. There's too much detritus left over from the winter. I need to get the left over salt off my roads before they start deteriorating.
Add to this that I don't think the next week or so is going to be much fun in that Mother's Day is this coming Sunday. Sigh. Now, to be clear, I don't begrudge the mothers of the world a day to celebrate the fact they've brought offspring into the world. I really don't. Motherhood is a hard job; the moms of the world deserve a day to sleep in and have breakfast in bed. I'm not knocking anyone. It's just a very hard day for us infertile myrtles, and I really don't think that people who have kids get that. Mother's day is not designed to remind us of what we don't have, but desperately want, but that's what it turns out to be. Every sappy commercial for reasonably priced jewelry bought by toddlers "who took out their mom's car without permission to go to the mall" turns me to mush...and reminds me of what I don't have. These commercials instantly bring to mind the horrible price I've had to pay to be cancer-free; of the price I've had to pay to survive. I can live with the grand bargain I've made, but only if it's not shoved in my face every three minutes. I don't want to think about it. That's the way I deal with it. It's there, yes, but if I can avoid thinking about it, all the better. This time of year, however, with the incessant ad bombardment, it's hard to avoid thinking about it. Last year, I finally broke down in tears after viewing, of all things, a Lowe's commercial, advertising, of all things, paint, that was tailored around Mother's Day. I wonder what's going to make the dam burst this year? Ads for reasonably priced jewelry? Will Hallmark send the flood flowing? Or will it be an ad for Teleflora? We'll just have to see, I suppose, because something will start it off. I just know it. I've got an uncomfortable lump in my throat as I write this screed, so God only knows what kind of run on the kleenex box will occur when I really decide to let loose.
Even if the weather's nice, I will avoid the lake next Sunday, because it will be chock-a-block full of families, celebrating Mother's Day with a nice walk around the lake on a sunny spring Sunday. Walking around the lake is a family friendly activity, after all; a picture-perfect example of what families should do on Sundays, if only there was enough time every Sunday, between soccer and baseball practices to accomplish such a thing. There will be loads of kiddies in wagons, on scooters, bikes, and their number will undoubtedly include some overly-padded kids who desperately wanted to rollerblade around the lake, the little plastic wheels on their faux-skates deteriorating with every push, but who are having trouble making it. The trails will be clogged with such people, and it will be intolerable to me, who would like nothing more than to be carting my own child around in a stroller or a wagon, enjoying the day like everyone else. We will also avoid any restaurant in town, the mall, movie theaters, etc. Everyone will be out celebrating Mother's Day, in all these locations. Of course, this means our Sunday will probably be spent at home, but by then, at least, the airwaves will be free of Mother's Day ads by that point so I should be able to watch tee vee without being reminded of what I don't have.
Hope will only get you so far in a situation like this. I can hope that one day we'll be able to adopt a baby, but that is so far off in the future, and such a crapshoot in the first place, that I can't really think about it right now. I can't delude myself with the hope that it might happen. It feels like when you're dead broke and you wish on a star to win the lottery. Sure, it might happen. But will it? Probably not. You can't organize your life around a wish that might never be granted. If it's not, then I'll forever be destined to be everyone's favorite auntie. The cool aunt who they can relate to. But will those nieces and nephews who love me so much now bury me when I die if the husband's not around? Would I have made enough of an impact in their lives to even warrant them showing up for my funeral? Or would they skip it, because they have something going on in their lives that prevents them from dropping all and attending, working on the assumption that, "Aunt Kathy would understand." This is the kind of crap you're forced to think about when you don't have kids. The childless of the world do not have the same givens in solving life's theorems that those with children do. Is it fair? No, but when is life ever fair? This is the bargain I've made, and I'll have to live with it. This week, however, it's on my mind a little more than most.
Forgive all the maudlin Monday morning ramblings, my devoted Cake Eater readers. Suffice it to say, I'll just be happy when Mother's Day is over with, and I can get back to comfortably ignoring all of this stuff.
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I Suppose I Should Write Something
Even though I don't really feel like it.
A couple of things, though, in the ever handy bullet format.
I'm feeling much better, thanks for asking. But the infection and the subsequent yuckiness really took the wind out of my sails. I keep waiting to get my energy back, and it does come back in short bursts, but then I crash. Again, I guess this is just yet another lesson in how fragile our bodies can be and while they can take a substantial amount of abuse, it does take some time to get back up and running.
As far as where we stand on the pain in the ass lymphocele, well, that's a long story. Last week, once I'd recovered from the infection, I called in to Dr. Academic's office, to see where we went from there. The nurses jointly decided they wanted to see me, to check out my still-weeping wound (yes, the lymphocele was actually draining out of the incision they'd made when they'd inserted the dreaded catheter). The nurse practitioner, a nice lady who I had met before, decided that they wanted me to keep the wound open for at least three weeks, and while I was in the shower every day, to press down on it, to get more fluid out, the theory behind this being that it would reduce the inflammation. The rest of the time, I needed to keep it clean and covered with gauze. To put it bluntly: yeeeeuch! I was skeptical it would work, but I went along with it, because, after the first try, it actually did seem to reduce the inflammation and the pain. I was to check back with them in three weeks, whence I'd probably have another scan to see where we were at.
Unfortunately, however, the wound decided it, indeed, had a mind of its own and decided to close up the other day. It happened in about four hours, and there really wasn't much to do about it, other than call in and inform the nurses of what had happened. It was then decided that since the lympocele had, in actuality, shrunk up dramatically, according to the cat scan I had when I was in the ER, that they wanted to see if it would continue along that path. I was to report in if it became more painful or the pressure increased, but for the time being, we be on our own, kids.
So, pretty much, we're right back where we started. The lymphocele is actually smaller. I can tell as much by feeling it, but there's been so much intervention that the scar tissue has become quite tough and it feels like there's a medium sized nugget in my lower left pelvis. It's rough. It's bumpy. And it shouldn't be there. The original pain that led me to go through all this nonsense is back, as is the numbness in my thigh. Sigh. Fortunately, they put me on a new, non-narcotic pain killer that actually works better than over the counter pain relievers. It's called Tramadol, and it's actually fairly decent and doesn't leave me loopy. I highly recommend it for anyone who doesn't want to go the Percocet/Vicodin route for any number of reasons.
As far as surgery is concerned, the nurse practitioner is very much against it, because, mainly, it could just bring me right back to square one in the future, as in I might get another lymphocele because they went in and took this one out. Apparently, according to her, these things form, partly, because of the retractors they use during surgery, to hold the area open so the surgeons can work on the innards. It didn't make much sense to her to put me in the same situation, with the same tools in use, to solve the problem. I got the feeling that surgery wasn't off the table entirely, but that it would be a fairly drastic measure that they're not at all sure would work. It's sort of a Hail Mary, I gathered.
I went to a luncheon yesterday at one of the local country clubs (you can't swing a dead cat in this neighborhood without hitting a country club. Or a spa, for that matter.) to "celebrate" the volunteers at the hospital. I think I'll skip going next year because, dear God in heaven, was it incredibly boring. Oy vey. We had to sit through two speeches, one from the president of the hospital, thanking us for all our hard work, and one from the customer service chief at the hospital, who, according to one of my table mates, had appropriated her speech from one of Oprah's latest online self-improvement seminars. Then we had a storyteller for "entertainment" purposes, and I had the "pleasure" of hearing "Goldilocks and the Three Bears" in Finnish. Woohoo! By the time the food arrived, we'd been sitting there for two and a half hours already and I was about ready to go, so I lied to my table mates and told them I hadn't expected this thing to go so long, and I had an appointment to go to, so I scooted out before dessert was served. My bad, but it allowed me to leave before I became absolutely exhausted, so I don't feel too badly about it, on the whole.
Another weird thing was that they "honored" me for working 300 volunteer hours. I don't quite see how that's possible since I've only been volunteering since January. At four hours per week, that puts me at sixteen hours per month. Three months x 16= 48 hours. I know I picked up some extra shifts along the way, so the number is actually higher than that, but someone didn't do the math correctly.
If you've got some extra room on your prayer list, throw one out there for one of my brothers, would ya? I'm not getting into it, because, honestly, that would be the last thing he needs at this point in time, suffice it to say, however, he's going through a very rough time right now and could use any happy thoughts/good vibes/prayers anyone would be willing to send his way.
I would really appreciate it if spring would show up sometime soon. We had snow on Saturday. I shit you not. It's been freezing here, and I can't hardly believe that the first of May is tomorrow. This is just bullshit, and the husband and I are seriously considering moving south of the Mason-Dixon line. We're tired of it.
The husband and I have a book launch party to go to tomorrow night and, as I've never been to a launch before, I haven't the foggiest idea of what to wear. If anyone has any clues, drop them in the comments section.
Hopefully, that will do you for a time, my devoted, yet neglected, Cake Eater readers.
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Prayers being said by two in Florida. Hang in there.
Have long said that the new definition of a "Yankee" is one that would rather shovel snow than mow grass. We are mowing grass down here in the Sunshine State. And battling "love bugs". They are a good reason not to move too far south.
Posted by: JB in Florida at April 30, 2008 11:47 PM (S0z6q)
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I find that loud florescent pant suits and faux- pearls can't go wrong at book launch parties. Unless, of course, you like the author. I've got nothing for you in that case.
Posted by: Doug Williams at May 01, 2008 09:22 AM (dgDzA)
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Sending all good vibes to your bro.
Hating the hell outta those lymphoceles.
Thinking the next person to speak of "global warming" is gonna get a spork in the eye.
Thinking that anything other than a velour track suit would be fine for a book launch.
*love*
A man heckling First Lady Laura Bush and daughter Jenna outside the 92nd Street Y was arrested after he punched a wheelchair-bound girl whose parents had told him to shut up, authorities said yesterday. German Talis, 22, was shouting obscenities at the Bushes, who were leaving the building Tuesday, when he crossed paths with Wendy and John Lovetro and their daughter Maureen, 18, who has cerebral palsy.
They had been in the audience to hear the Bushes talk about their children's book, "Read All About It."
"He began yelling about Iraq and Iran at Jenna Bush. She was waving at the crowd. I told the guy, 'What are you doing? Shut up. This is about a child and books,' " said John Lovetro. "He was unperturbed. I said, 'Get out of here! You're being a moron!' "
The next thing he knew, Talis was allegedly punching Maureen - a fan of the first lady since meeting her in 2004.
"I heard my daughter hysterical yelling, 'He's hitting me!' " said Wendy Lovetro.
"He punched her on the shoulder blades, but that wasn't enough," she said.
"My husband pushed the wheelchair away from him and he reached beyond my husband and began pounding my daughter in the thigh." {...}
Pardon the language, but WHAT THE FUCK?
Apparently it's all right to start punching a young lady who's been put in a wheelchair by cerebral palsy when her family tells you to stop heckling the First Lady and her daughter? Oh, yeah, you're the big man, aren't you? Striking a blow for Free Speech by putting the smackdown on a crippled young woman? This is the best way to get your point about the "atrocities" in Iraq across? What are you doing? Trading brutality for brutality?
What the fuck?
There are days when I want eugenics and I want them now, simply because idiots like this one would be the first ones to go.
Alexander Fleming, I am Your Humble Servant
Blessed antibiotics. Verily, if we didn't have them in this day and age, I think it could be said that I might very well have been a goner this past week. But we do have them, so I can keep on bugging you, my devoted Cake Eater readers.
Yes, I am better. I'm still not pumping on all four cylinders, but am doing ok on about two and a half.
It's been such an eventful past week and a half, that I don't really know where to begin, so I shall try and sum things up in bullet format, because, honestly, I don't have the energy to put this thing in essay format. Here's the story:
Went in to the hospital on Friday, the eleventh, to have another go with the sclerosis. They put the kaibosh on that once it became obvious that I was feeling the 98% pure alcohol they were pumping in---which I shouldn't have been. Down the hall to the X-Ray machine they go, they pump in some contrast, take some pictures, and ascertain that there's a hole in the lymphocele, dear Henry, because the contrast is leaking out of it and into my peritoneal cavity. Furthermore, the radiologist informs me that the fluid that's draining into my neato bag looks more like peritoneal cavity fluid than it does like lymphatic fluid this hole might explain it. I've got some cool photos of this procedure, but as they're not of the digital variety, I won't be posting them. Suffice it to say, they decided to send me home while they consulted with Dr. Academic to see what he wanted to do.
We trudge home, only to find out four hours later that Dr. Academic is out of town and his main nurse has decided to take the day off in celebration. The question of what to do gets thrown to the nurse practitioner, who is fairly decent but whom I don't know at all, and she punts: she says, "Let's wait and see if the lymphocele doesn't close up so we can have another go with the sclerosis." Greeeeaaaaat.
The drainage tube gets clogged (yeah, I know, bleech) on Sunday, which involves another trip down to the hospital. The pain is also a lot worse, and I can't really figure out why. There's been pain associated with this thing, but since the installation, it's wheedled its way down. Now it's back at full, nerve rending force. It feels like it's going away after the de-clogging, but it doesn't. It gets worse. By the wee hours of Monday morning, I'm in such pain that I'm telling the husband we need to go back down to the hospital. He's exhausted, however, and is in no mood to coordinate an early hours ER trip---with all that entails for us, who have no car---so I suck it up, take some pain meds, and go to bed, hoping it will be better in the morning.
It's not better in the morning. In fact, I scream not once, not twice, but three times as I tried to get out of bed. Excruciating, I believe, would be the word to describe it. We call Dr. Academic's off-hours answering service and announce that we're heading to the hospital. We do the same with the interventional radiology department. We get checked into the ER, and after a wait, are introduced to the nice people who will be handling my case. One nice nurse and one nice doctor, who, between the two of them, manage to hook me up to some IV morphine (oh, the lovely morphine) and get me set up for another CT scan. I'm wheeled down to the CT scanner, they run me through, shoot me up with some contrast, and they declare all looks fine, and they can't understand why I'd be in such pain. I even get a new radiologist, who wants me to actually keep the thing in so I can undergo more sclerosis procedures in a few weeks. Bite me. I tell him the thing's coming out.
I actually felt sorry for the ER doctor, who really was a very nice guy, trying to coordinate everything. Seems as if Dr. Academic decided this would be a good week to take a vacation, so he's not around. My original radiologist isn't around either. I'm getting second-stringers all the way around. Distinguished second-stringers, but second-stringers nonetheless. Yet, we all agree on the plan to remove the catheter, and, after a few hours of waiting, which went fine for me, because I was high as a kite, but was somewhat more trying for the husband, the very nice nurse who'd been handling my drain all along came down and removed the thing, and I was finally released. I felt better and had hopes everything would get better entirely in time.
It didn't. The pain was still there that night, and when I awoke at about four in the morning, completely drenched, I was tempted to put it off as a night sweat, but took my temperature anyway. Good thing I did, too, because it was 102. The good times just keep coming!
Next morning, we call into Dr. Academic's office first thing, and the husband, who has HAD IT with being shunted around, stays on-hold and when the main nurse finally picks up the line, shoots so much information about what's happened over the past couple of days that I think the poor woman's ears must be smoking. When he's done with his laundry list, he hands the phone over to me. She asks, "What's going on?" "I think it's infected. I'm running a fever and I'm in pain. It's red in a few spots." "Chills?" "Yep." "Ok, let me talk to the other nurse and we'll get a prescription for some antibiotics called in for you." A half hour later, I've got the actual prescription in my hot little hands and am ingesting a Levanquin tablet. It helps. Immediately. The pain isn't a whole lot better, but it's easing. The fevers haven't gone away, but I feel as if we're getting a handle on things. This is when it becomes clear that my bedroom is going to be the extent of my world for the next few days.
I sleep a lot. I manage to lose my appetite entirely, but somehow manage to subsist on lifesavers and sprite alone (and I'm thinking the fact I've got a couple of good sized hamhocks on my ass had something to do with it.). The husband is caregiver extraordinaire. He takes temperatures, tries to get me to eat, keeps the drugs at hand, helps me up and down, and is just in general a good egg. By Friday, which is when the main nurse told me I would be feeling better, I am actually feeling a bit better. I'm very fond of drugs which do precisely what they say they're going to do. Alexander Fleming: I am your bitch. Whatever you might need from the hereafter, I'm your girl. Just say the word.
Yesterday, I was able to walk around the neighborhood a bit, which was nice because it was GORGEOUS outside yesterday. Woohoo. Spring has finally arrived, it seems. Only question is, will Kathy get to enjoy it this year? The verdict's still out on that one. The problem of the infection may have been solved, but the lymphocele's still there, throbbing away, and I haven't the foggiest on what we're going to do about it. I suspect surgery. We'll just have to see, though.
And, now, my devoted Cake Eater readers, I'm off to take a nap, because this recapping business is tiring. Particularly when you're on percocet.
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I'm so sorry to hear about all of your troubles. I'm keeping you in my prayers...
Posted by: Phoenix at April 22, 2008 07:42 AM (4N2f4)
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for some reason, i kept thinking -- but she's ian fleming's servant *too*, right? for all the bond films that helped her through this?
... guess i was wrong; glad you got the right fleming!
keeping you in my thoughts and prayers, kathy.
Posted by: amelie at April 22, 2008 10:11 AM (EpZn6)
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Good GAWD. I hope things pick up and that damned thing just disappears. You sure do deserve it.
Still lighting candles and YAY! Spring! It's about effin' time, eh?
Posted by: Margi at April 22, 2008 02:07 PM (d5oKp)
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Kathy,
What can I say -- if I was choosing up sides for a game of red rover red rover -- you would be my first pic as you have stamina and a strength to endure!!!
As always -- we are in your corner and praying for you!!!
-- Janis, Russ and Moses
PS - Moses goes in for surgery tomorrow to repair a double inguinal (groin) hernia at Methodist. We will keep you posted on his recovery. God Speed friend!
Posted by: The Lovely Janis at April 23, 2008 04:11 PM (BhHL1)
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Russ wants me to let you know that AMC is airing "The Great Escape" on May 6th and he suggests that you do a live blog during it. I am sure he will volunteer to participate in the live blog too.
Some how this is supposed to make you laugh and get better soon.
Take care -- Janis
Posted by: The Lovely Janis at April 23, 2008 07:00 PM (BhHL1)
Cake Eater Update
This afternoon I had the pleasure of speaking briefly with our beloved Kathy. While she is toughing it out in true dignified Cake Eater fashion, she is not feeling that well at the moment. The catheter that was inserted last week has developed an infection. She is presently on antibiotics and hopes to resume regular posting as soon as she is able.
Posted by: Moses from Winterset at April 18, 2008 07:48 PM (BhHL1)
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My prayers are with you and your family, and that you will be through the medical "crap" quickly. It is all too common these days. Hang in there!
And since we have spent much more than our share in medical hell we are over-qualified in saying this: nurses and doctors don't know everything - they just pretend that they do. There is, after all, a reason as to why it is called the "Practice" of medicine. Do what feels best and works for you and tell them to go jump in a lake. They hate it when a patient gets testy - and even more when the patient shows more sense and knowledge than they do, but it's time we patients take the power back. After all - we're the "customer" -- not a money-generating unit although they seem to feel that way. Nurse Ratchet is alive and being cloned in Florida. We'll try to stop the exporting, but think we're too late.
Hope that you are laughing or at least know you aren't alone in your experiences! You made me laugh so hard over your Christmas experiences.
Posted by: JB in Florida at April 20, 2008 10:17 PM (S0z6q)