This is going to seem a lot like inside baseball talk to those of you who don't read the FT on Thursdays---or ever---but this has just been so incredibly well done, I have to comment on it. Last week, we had some delivery issues and I was only informed this morning that I missed the resolution I'd been waiting for! I'm kind of pisssed off that, of all days, the delivery routine was goofed, but alas, there is this wonderful thing called the Internet and, fortunately, the resolution has been archived.

Every Thursday, Martin Lukes' column is published in the FT---or at least it was until around Christmas time, when his last column appeared. Until recently, Martin was the freshly-appointed transplant CEO of a-b global, an Atlanta based company, when he was arrested and tried on insider trading charges. Having been found guilty on four counts of insider trading, he was sentenced to two years and three months in a federal correctional facility in Florida. Apparently, his son, Jake, a trader, ratted him out to the Feds to save his own skin.

Now, Martin is quite the innovative business leader, as detailed in this article:

{...}His first - and some would say greatest - contribution to management thinking came in 2001 when he coined the term Creovation™, a deceptively profound hybrid of creativity and innovation. Over the following seven years this concept was much imitated by other leading corporations, though never bettered. Even General Electric, much revered for its management methods, followed Mr Lukes by launching its "Ecomagination" initiative, which experts criticised as a feeble imitation of the original.

Above all Mr Lukes was a man of paradox. He was a master of spin yet understood the power of authenticity - his sign-off to his cult CEO blog Mind Bullets from the Chairman was "Keep it authentic". He was also a world-class communicator. Reuben Smart, founder of the image consultancy ifwhatwhy!?, said: "At the end of the day, Martin Lukes reached out in a uniquely motivational way to set a benchmark for global practitioners in the communications space."{...]

While, undoubtedly, the fact that his ex-wife is now at the helm of a-b global (and is doing quite well with it) stings, at least his current wife and mother of his triplets is sticking by him. Also, according to his co-author, Lucy Kellaway, his post-incarceration prospects look great. He just has to bide his time in prison, and I'm sure he'll come back roaring.

Now, most of you, my devoted Cake Eater readers, are probably wondering, 'why is she calling this the best gag ever?' Well, it's because of this: Martin Lukes doesn't really exist. He's an amalgam of the worst of business speak and corporate leadership, rolled into one fictitious character, meant to skewer the conventional business thought of this particular day and age. He's the creation of Lucy Kellaway, and while I haven't been reading his column as long as some people have, I'm nonetheless going to miss Martin's exploits. (My personal favorite was while he was on a junket to Svalbard, to launch a-b global's green initiative, and he shot a rampaging polar bear. Of course he fired off his shotgun in self-defense, but he managed to escape any serious ramifications by means of his incredible mastery of PR.)

If you've got some time to kill, and are looking for some entertaining reading, I would highly recommend perusing the archive of Martin's past columns. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll claim it was much better than Cats. I swear.

Posted by: Kathy at 10:11 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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I read this on Saturday, and meant to post about it, but, well, I kind of forgot all about it. Not that I should have, but you know me, Mrs. Chemo Brain (yes, it's getting better, but I'm still having issues with coming up with names and short term memory stuff), and if I can forget about it, I will. Anyway, without any further ado, I shall hand you over to Christopher Caldwell, from the FT.

The good bits:

The Netherlands has spent the past several weeks in a political crisis out of a novel by Borges. People are worried that a politician might say something he has already said. And they are divided over how to interpret a film that may not exist. Last August, the anti-immigration legislator, Geert Wilders, wrote in the daily De Volkskrant: “I’ve had enough of Islam in the Netherlands – not one more Muslim immigrant. I’ve had enough of Allah and Mohammed in the Netherlands – not one more mosque.” Mr Wilders, whose Freedom party controls nine of the 150 seats in the Dutch lower house, also urged banning the Koran, which he calls “the Islamic Mein Kampf.

But his announcement in late November that he would make a short film to that effect sent the government into a panic. The cabinet met in secret. It ordered foreign embassies to draw up evacuation plans in case of mob violence. It put the mayors of Dutch cities on alert. It arranged meetings with imams and other Muslim representatives, distancing itself from Mr WildersÂ’ positions. The interior, justice and foreign ministers summoned Mr Wilders to meetings, and the countryÂ’s terrorism co-ordinator warned him that he might have to leave the country for his own security. The government reportedly investigated whether it would be possible to block or delay Mr WildersÂ’s broadcast.

Not that there is anything illogical about taking precautions against radical Islam. ...Each time a gauntlet is thrown down, someone will credibly promise violence in the name of Islam. Mr WildersÂ’ film idea was no exception. At the European parliament in Strasbourg last week, Ahmad Badr al-Din Hassoun, Grand Mufti of Syria, warned that Mr Wilders would be responsible for any “violence and bloodshed” that resulted from his film – and that the Dutch people would, in turn, be responsible for reining him in. Noor Farida Ariffin, the departing  Malaysian ambassador, told De Volkskrant: “Compared to what IÂ’m expecting, the riots over the Danish cartoons will look like a picnic.”

{...}Mr Wilders wrote a triumphant op-ed in de Volkskrant this week asking people to imagine what would happen if he had made a film describing the Bible as “fascistic”: “Would Dutch embassies in countries where a lot of Christians live, like Germany and Belgium, have notified Dutch residents and dusted off their evacuation plans?”

Was Mr Wilders asserting a right to free speech? Or was he dressing up a gratuitous religious insult in constitutional language? He was doing both, of course. In their eagerness to keep Mr Wilders from airing his argument, the Dutch authorities helped make it for him. They were unable to admit that widespread worries about violence stem from a problem (extremism in the Muslim world) and not just from an approach to a problem (Mr Wilders’s brusqueness). At a speech in Madrid, Maxime Verhagen, the foreign minister, said: “It is difficult to anticipate the content of the film, but freedom of expression doesn’t mean the right to offend.” It doesn’t? Well, if it doesn’t, then freedom of expression is not much of a right.

{...}We have more religious pluralism than the western liberal system was designed to cope with. This does not necessarily mean that liberalism cannot handle pluralism, but certainly we are in the midst of an experiment. Mr Wilders aims to show that the experiment has failed and that one of the ingredients in our system of freedom of religion – either the liberalism or the pluralism – is going to have to go.{...}

Exactly. Go read the whole thing.

Should be interesting to see if this wild haired man's film actually exists, or if rather, as I suspect, this is a stunt.

Posted by: Kathy at 06:30 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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No, really.

Retired hospital porter Steve Smith, who is suffering from a potentially fatal heart defect, won almost 19 million pounds ($38 million) on Britain's National Lottery -- but said he would give it all up if he could spend a few more years living with his wife Ida.

"I have a one in 10 chance of living. It's like a ticking time bomb," said the 58-year-old Smith, enjoying a bittersweet glass of celebratory champagne with his wife Ida.

Smith, who has an aortic aneurysm, told reporters when collecting his check: "It's Ida I worry for, it's leaving her behind. I would give all that back if I am allowed to still be with her because there are no shops in the cemetery are there?"{...}

It's nice to know in this day and age of people bickering endlessly over pennies on the dollar, that someone's got his priorities straight.

Posted by: Kathy at 06:09 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Eeew.

Travel agency OssiUrlaub.de said it would start taking bookings from Friday for a trial nudist day trip from the eastern German town of Erfurt to the popular Baltic Sea resort of Usedom, planned for July 5 and costing 499 euros ($735).

"It's expensive, I know," managing director Enrico Hess told Reuters by phone. "It's because the plane's very small. There's no real reason why a flight in which one flies naked should be more expensive than any other."

The 55 passengers will have to remain clothed until they board, and dress before disembarking, said Hess. The crew will remain clothed throughout the flight for safety reasons.

"I wish I could say we thought of it ourselves but the idea came from a customer," Hess told Reuters by phone. "It's an unusual gap in the market."{...}

I suppose the really relevant question in all of this is: Will they be steam cleaning the seats in the plane afterward?

Posted by: Kathy at 09:07 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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...your garden variety internet catfight?

It would appear that there are going to be protests in various cities on February 10th.

I have no idea about any of this stuff, but it sure is fascinating to watch. Although that doll in the video is WAY creepy.

Posted by: Kathy at 07:51 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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To: Any future dischargees I might handle sometime in the near future
From: Moi, your volunteer with the mostest
Re: Behavior

Dudes, seriously. It's not my fault if your ride shows up at the wrong door. Don't take the fact you have to wait a bit while we sort things out on me, eh? I'm just the girl with the wheelchair.

The same goes if your doctor prescribes you a drug with a whopping co-pay. Don't throw a fit in the discharge pharmacy and then lump me in with the pharmacist when you scream, "You're all just a no-good lot of bloodsuckers!"

Again, I'm just the girl with the wheelchair.

To: The Nurses
From: Moi, your volunteer with the mostest
Re: Transfers

People, I'm more than happy to give someone a wheelchair ride to wherever they need to go---really and truly, I am---but I can't do it if they have an IV attached. It's against regulations---and you know this because the job generally falls to you when this occurs. So, even if the guy is going to have his IV locked off sometime in the next half hour, don't call me until the IV is gone. Otherwise, I'm just standing around, when I could be doing something exciting. Like a blood bank run. The chances that Dracula could intercept me, and whisk me away to Transylvania for an eternity of blood sucking, decrease dramatically when you do this.

Posted by: Kathy at 04:20 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Damn, that kid's pretty sharp.

{ht: Ace}

Posted by: Kathy at 06:17 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Ok, so two things are apparent to me after watching this video:

1. I have until February 10th to stock up on popcorn.

2. Apparently, Steven Hawking is one of the members of "Anonymous" because he's obviously the voice over. Like, duh.

Might want to go a little more covert there, Stevie.

{ht: wwtdd who also has a neato link to some crazy ass shit that the broad from The King of Queens allegedly wrote.}

Posted by: Kathy at 12:54 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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This is what you get with socialized medicine.

Doctors are calling for NHS treatment to be withheld from patients who are too old or who lead unhealthy lives.

Smokers, heavy drinkers, the obese and the elderly should be barred from receiving some operations, according to doctors, with most saying the health service cannot afford to provide free care to everyone.

£1.7 billion is spent treating diseases caused by smoking, such as lung cancer and emphysema

Fertility treatment and "social" abortions are also on the list of procedures that many doctors say should not be funded by the state.

The findings of a survey conducted by Doctor magazine sparked a fierce row last night, with the British Medical Association and campaign groups describing the recommendations from family and hospital doctors as "out­rageous" and "disgraceful".

About one in 10 hospitals already deny some surgery to obese patients and smokers, with restrictions most common in hospitals battling debt.

Managers defend the policies because of the higher risk of complications on the operating table for unfit patients. But critics believe that patients are being denied care simply to save money.

{...}Among the survey of 870 family and hospital doctors, almost 60 per cent said the NHS could not provide full healthcare to everyone and that some individuals should pay for services.

One in three said that elderly patients should not be given free treatment if it were unlikely to do them good for long. Half thought that smokers should be denied a heart bypass, while a quarter believed that the obese should be denied hip replacements.

{...}Ninety-four per cent said that an alcoholic who refused to stop drinking should not be allowed a liver transplant, while one in five said taxpayers should not pay for "social abortions" and fertility treatment.{...}

Doctors in the UK apparently think the only people they should treat are the people who never get sick.

Well, that would assuredly leave more time for golf.

Posted by: Kathy at 12:06 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Check this out:

I have absolutely no idea if this is for real, and I suspect it's not, but wouldn't it be super duper suh-weet if it was?

Let me know when the fighting starts. I need to stock up on popcorn.

{ht: wwtdd}

UPDATE from The Husband: I find it curious...that when you enter the following search string into Google (anonymous scientology challenge puppies fish oil), the first result is this {link}.

Posted by: Kathy at 06:13 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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The Bond people are back to their Inquisition-like ways by announcing the title of the twenty-second film in the series: Quantum of Solace

{...}Co-producer Michael Wilson said the title was taken from a short story by Ian Fleming, the author who created Bond.

"We thought it was an intriguing title and referenced what is happening to Bond and what happens in the film," he told reporters.

{...}Several reporters at the press launch questioned whether the film makers should have opted for a snappier title. A blogger for the Guardian newspaper was already asking whether it was the "worst Bond title ever?"

Craig defended the name. "At the end of the last movie his heart's been broken and he doesn't have that quantum of solace, he doesn't have that ... closure on what happened in his life and he needs to find out," he told Reuters in an interview.

"What is great about it is it also applies to something very important in the plot," he said during a break from filming.{...}

I told the husband about the title whilst we were chatting earlier and he said, "{...} undoubtedly the plot will involve some goofy, dumbed down high-end physics - hence the name." Way to call it, darlin'!

This has got to be, hands down, the dumbest Bond film title of any of these films---and that's saying something, because there are some serious, dumbass titles on record already. Anyone remember License to Kill(OB-vious!) or Moonraker (who wants that job?), The Spy Who Loved Me (uh, hate to tell you this, but James isn't into the concept called 'love'.) Tomorrow Never Dies (what the hell is that supposed to mean?) or my personal favorite, Octopussy (let's avoid going there, shall we?)? I could go on, but really. Quantum of Solace? What the hell were you people thinking? I realize that they're taking "Bond back to the beginning" and all that, but there's absolutely no reason why they have to stick with Fleming's title. After all, the man may have created a memorable character in Bond, but, all in all, he was a pretty crappy writer. But maybe I'm worrying over nothing. Five bucks says it won't make it past the focus groups.

Gah. So, the torture has started. Good times. Good times! I simply wish these people would shut the hell up, work on the film and then release it! Stop with the press conferences already!

Posted by: Kathy at 01:32 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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One of my favorite things is watching people get made over. It's fun and it satisfies my need for instant gratification, like when I want chips and I open up a bag of Fritos and begin to chow down In other words, it's good fun, but, unlike the chips, doesn't add any poundage to my already fine wide arse. Since Trinny and Susannah are no longer the backbone of BBCAmerica, I find myself watching the American version of What Not to Wear on a regular basis, and even though I still feel the need to bitchslap Stacy London for being, well, a monstrously bitchy poseur with waaaay too many pairs of gorgeous Louboutins at her disposal, I find that, if I switch channels when she becomes annoying, it nonetheless satisfies my jones. But I still want more, and fortunately, one of our friends has obliged me.

As I mentioned in this post, the husband is now getting his hair cut by one of his regular (and favorite) customers, Christopher Hopkins. Christopher has earned the moniker "The Makeover Guy" over the years as, well, it's what he does---and he does it well. So well, in fact, that he's got a book coming out at the beginning of May, entitled Staging Your Comeback: A Complete Beauty Revival for Women Over 45. Christopher gets it, to put it simply. He knows that beauty is about maximizing what you've got, and sorting out the fine art of the optical illusion to make you look your best, and with this project he's been working with middle-aged women, who are struggling with what time has done to them and gives them solutions to counteract it, while still managing to look age appropriate and fabulous. Check out this video he's put up on YouTube and see what the man can do.

Amazing, no?

And, yes, he really is as nice and as funny as he appears to be.

The husband and I are very excited and happy that his book is coming out soon and hope it does very, very well---and will do what we can to ensure that outcome---so you, my devoted Cake Eater readers, can expect a few more plugs in the coming months.

Posted by: Kathy at 11:33 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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So, a couple of weeks ago, more spam found its way into the Cake Eater mailbox.

The only thing different about this and the crap that the Minnesotans for Romney and Nigerian oil scammers keep dumping into my mailbox is that it came from a live email address---with a living, breathing human being on the receiving end. The email was from a PR rep, promoting a book, and it was full of information about the author and the work that he was so diligently plugging. I found out that the email was live when I replied and told the guy to take me off his list, because I generally don't comment on books that I haven't read. Thinking nothing of it, I sent the email off into the netherworld. Shortly thereafter, a reply came flying back via the interwebs, and I was surprised to be offered a review copy of the book, along with the promise to make the author available for interviews and podcasts.

Momentarily stunned, I nonetheless jumped on the chance to get a free book. It was even something I might read, so that sweetened the pot a bit, and I gave the guy my address and he said he'd send a copy straight out. I received the copy yesterday and I'm almost done with it. It's not highbrow fiction, but rather a thriller, so it's pretty much right up my alley. While it's definitely not the type of envelope I'm used to receiving from publishing companies (those are usually of the SASE variety, full to the brim with crap I sent them, which they duly recognized as crap and sent back.) it was pretty cool nonetheless.

But all of this begs the question: what the hell were these people thinking when they sent me, of all people, that email in the first place? While I'm all for free swag, and do definitely want to interview the guy, I mean, really. It's not like I'm Instapundit or anything. I have no illusions about my place in the blogging world, and I'm definitely not at the top of the heap, ya dig? But, hell, if someone wants to throw me a bone, I'll yank it out of midair and see what kind of meat I can get off it.

If nothing else, it's a new experience. And that, in the words of our fabulous felony committing housewife of the century, is a good thing.

Posted by: Kathy at 12:18 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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...Aussie actor, Heath Ledger, was found dead in his NY apartment yesterday. He was twenty-eight-years-old, and the father of a two-year-old daughter, Matilda. Rest In Peace.

I remember years ago, back when I used to read Vanity Fair on a monthly basis, they put Ledger on the cover and called him, "the next big thing," or something similarly asinine and completely out of perspective for a young actor who didn't really have anything remarkable under his belt. Which, of course, doesn't really mean anything other than that he'd had the good sense to hire a PR person who had access to the likes of Graydon Carter. Whoo. Big hairy deal. Vanity Fair is notorious for this sort of stuff. They do it all the time, and many a promising actor's career has gone up in flames (Gretchen Mol, thy name is legend). Surprisingly, Ledger slowly carved out a body of work that did, indeed, live up to the hype. While I never saw Brokeback Mountain, everyone who did and who talked to me about it said he was absolutely remarkable in it. I was---and am---sincerely looking forward to his portrayal of The Joker in The Dark Knight. If the trailer is anything to go by, well, it should be astonishing.

The coverage of his death isn't surprising, nor is the fact that he, probably, died of a drug overdose. What is surprising, although it shouldn't be, is that the Westboro Baptist Church is announcing that, yes, indeed, they will be picketing his funeral because of his portrayal of a gay cowboy in Brokeback Mountain. (I would rather die than link the church, so here's a photo of the press release. If you want to go find them, type "G0d Hates Fags" into Google and see what pops up.)

{press release found at WWTDD, along with scintillating commentary}

Yes, these are the same people who regularly picket the funerals of soldiers, because, by their reasoning, the soldiers deserved to die in Iraq because America loves gays, hence America deserves to be punished with dead soldiers. They show up at the funerals to make this known, you know, in case someone couldn't follow their math.

Now they're going to picket a man's funeral because of a character he portrayed.

You know, I'm not a big fan of church bombings. Really, I'm not. I find them atrocious, reprehensible, ad nauseam, ad infinitum. But I might be willing to put aside that loathing for a minute or two if, perhaps, someone would put a big chunk of C4 under their foundation and blow them all to Kingdom Come during a Sunday service.

I mean, look at it this way: they could finally find out if God really is as pissed off about gays as they say He is. It's more about sending them on a fact finding mission than domestic terrorism. Really and truly.*

This is a work of satire, ok? Don't take it seriously.

Posted by: Kathy at 11:56 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Bleeping Unions:

{...}About 114,000 registered Democrats – a record for Nevada - turned out to caucus in the state. With Barack Obama securing the endorsement of the powerful Culinary Workers Union, which represents 60,000 casino workers, members of Hillary Clinton’s campaign team had gone into Saturday’s vote fearing their candidate would be outgunned.

They need not have worried. Mrs ClintonÂ’s supporters, particularly Latino voters, were out in force in Nevada and helped their candidate win the state. At the New York, New York, many union members openly defied CWU instructions to support Mr Obama and instead backed Mrs Clinton.

Some, such as Qumar Faridi, a union shop steward at the nearby Monte Carlo casino, voted with the union and supported Mr Obama. “We have to stick together…we can’t break away,” he said. Mrs Clinton, he added, was “not union-friendly”.

But Santiago Espinoza and Maria Abiles, CWU members who also work at the Monte Carlo, said they had come to support Mrs Clinton. “It’s a private decision…I will back whoever I like,” said Mr Espinoza. Mrs Clinton, he added, was “the best person to become president…she has the most experience”.

About 80 per cent of the 2,800 employees at the New York, New York are members of the CWU, which in the days leading up to the vote was accused of voter intimidation by the Clinton camp. In the Staten Island room before the caucus, Toni Mitchels, who also works at the Monte Carlo, said union officials had spread misinformation about the voting process.

“A lot of the union representatives were lying to the employees in the cafeteria,” she said. “They were telling them they could only come to this caucus if they voted for Obama.”

Ms Mitchels, who said she decided to back Mr Obama before the Illinois senator was endorsed by the union, said the tactics “bothered me…[the union] didn’t need to bully anyone”.

{my emphasis}

I'm seriously beginning to wonder, if Obama gets the nomination, how many spontaneous resurrections will happen in Cook County come late October-early November.

Posted by: Kathy at 11:33 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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From my friend, Janelle, via email.

Every year, English teachers from across the USA submit their collections of actual analogies and metaphors found in high school essays. These excerpts are published each year to the amusement of teachers across the country. Here are last year's winners:

1. Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a Thigh Master.

2. His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

3. He spoke with the wisdom that can only come from experience, like a guy who went blind because he looked at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it and now goes around the country speaking at high schools about the dangers of looking at a solar eclipse without one of those boxes with a pinhole in it.

4. She grew on him like she was a colony of E. coli, and he was room temperature Canadian beef.

5. She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.

6. Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

7. He was as tall as a six-foot, three-inch tree.

8. The revelation that his marriage of 30 years had disintegrated because of his wife's infidelity came as a rude shock, like a surcharge at a formerly surcharge-free ATM machine.

9. The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.

10. McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.

11. From the attic came an unearthly howl. The whole scene had an eerie, surreal quality, like when you're on vacation in another city and Jeopardy comes on at 7:00 p.m. instead of 7:30.

12. Her hair glistened in the rain like a nose hair after a sneeze.

13. The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.

14. Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers raced across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.

15. They lived in a typical suburban neighborhood with picket fences that resembled Nancy Kerrigan's teeth.

16. John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.

17. He fell for her like his heart was a mob informant, and she was the East River.

18. Even in his last years, Granddad had a mind like a steel trap, only one that had been left out so long, it had rusted shut.

19. Shots rang out, as shots are wont to do.

20. The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.

21. The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.

22. He was as lame as a duck. Not the metaphorical lame duck, either, but a real duck that was actually lame, maybe from stepping on a land mine or something.

23. The ballerina rose gracefully en Pointe and extended one slender leg behind her, like a dog at a fire hydrant.

24. It was an American tradition, like fathers chasing kids around with power tools.

25. He was deeply in love. When she spoke, he thought he heard bells, as if she were a garbage truck backing up.

Posted by: Kathy at 11:31 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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I think most people remember this moment.

An actor schooled the UN on its priorities, and it worked, in many ways. Because Clooney had the temerity to point out the truth of the UN, that it has, and does, allow genocide to occur, even though its charter explicitly states the opposite, people in developed countries, around the world, finally got a clue as to how the UN was avoiding its duties. While I'm generally of the opinion that celebrities should stay the fuck out of politics, this is one of the extremely rare exceptions to that rule. In this instance, George hasn't really gotten what he was asking for, UN peacekeepers on the ground in Darfur, to protect refugees and keep the relief workers safe. Shocker. The African Union is still doing that job, and they're having a hard time with it, because everyone and their brother seems to be working against them. But he did push in the right direction, mentioning the phrase "right and wrong" whilst doing so, and for that he gets some points from me.

I respect George for fighting for Darfur. It's a worthy cause and he uses his voice and celebrity in a good way to fight for the people there. But that respect I have for George took a big hit when I found out he could be bought cheaply:

UNITED NATIONS (Reuters) - Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon named actor George Clooney, who has campaigned for refugees in Darfur, as a U.N. "messenger of peace" on Friday to promote the world body's peacekeeping efforts.

Clooney is the ninth U.N. messenger -- people chosen from the fields of art, music, literature and sports who have agreed to help focus attention on the United Nations' work.

U.N. spokeswoman Michele Montas said Clooney would have a special emphasis on peacekeeping. She said he had been "recognized for focusing public attention on crucial international political and social issues."{...}

What did they promise you, George, to get you to do this? Peacekeepers? Boots on the ground? I know there's some quid pro quo going on here. What is it, Georgie Porgy Puddin' and Pie? You have to know that you just got the shit end of the stick, eh? They're going to use you and you're not going to get a damn thing out of them. I'm sure you think you're doing a good thing here; that you're simply killing two birds with one stone, but you've just signed up to be an agent of an agency that doesn't give a damn about solving the problem that is Darfur.

Good work, bud! I'm sure that'll save some refugees from dying.

Posted by: Kathy at 10:49 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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More batshit fucking loco for your edification/entertainment.

I highly recommend checking out the second video, to hear about how Tom Cruise "saved" all the firefighters in NYC after 9/11. The third one focuses on his mission (impossible) to get psychiatry banned.

Good times, my devoted Cake Eater readers. Good times!

Posted by: Kathy at 01:30 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Yesterday, whilst I was volunteering at the hospital, I was in the employee-only elevator, a wheelchair before me, on my way to the third floor, to give someone a ride to freedom. A lady got on on the fifth floor and in the time it took to travel one floor, she gave me a thorough vetting and decided to open a conversation.

"I really like your hair. It's so carefree! It must be so easy to manage. I often think about cutting mine all off and starting fresh, like you."

The woman's hair was about three or four inches longer than mine.

"Uh," I replied, not really knowing what to say. "Thanks, but I'm in the process of growing it out. I lost all my hair when I went through chemo."

I didn't look at her face when, mercifully, the elevator arrived at my floor and I got out, but the volunteer I was with, who was charged with my continued training, was chuckling, so it must have been good.

Posted by: Kathy at 12:53 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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The husband, internet God that he is, recently found this super duper coo-el tool: Pandora Radio.

This is radio that puts the Music Genome Project to work. To Wit:

A given song is represented by a vector containing approximately 150 genes. Each gene corresponds to a characteristic of the music, for example, gender of lead vocalist, level of distortion on the electric guitar, type of background vocals, etc. Rock and pop songs have 150 genes, rap songs have 350, and jazz songs have approximately 400. Other genres of music, such as world and classical, have 300-500 genes. The system depends on a sufficient number of genes to render useful results. Each gene is assigned a number between 1 and 5, and fractional values are allowed but are limited to half integers.[1] (The term genome is borrowed from genetics.)

Given the vector of one or more songs, a list of other similar songs is constructed using a distance function.

To create a song's genome, it is analyzed by a musician in a process that takes 20 to 30 minutes per song. Ten percent of songs are analyzed by more than one technician to ensure conformity with the standards, i.e., reliability.

Basically what you do is enter in an artist that you like, and it finds more artists with similar music and creates a playlist around that. I currently have my Nicola Conte Radio playing---so I'm not only listening to songs by Nicola Conte, but also, The Herbaliser, Juan Tutrifo---and many, many more. It's a lot of fun to see what comes up and there's nothing random, or computerized, about the song selections. The first fits in with the second, the third, and so on and so forth.

The husband and I have, for a very long time, been fans of Soma FM, but...some of their playlists, particularly the Secret Agent Channel (which I adore simply because they throw out quotes from Bond movies between songs) are highly repetitive. If you don't like a song that's playing on Pandora, however, you can skip right past it---and what's more is that Pandora will take your selection into account, and will play the song less, more, or not at all if you so choose.

It's quite a cool tool, and I highly recommend it.

Posted by: Kathy at 12:35 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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