And there's no wistfulness attached to that statement, but I've always thought the place must be pretty kitschy, given that it's home to Tony Soprano, Kevin Smith, Alfred Einstein and, last but not least, Fausta.

Turns out I was right:

TRENTON, N.J. - With curious officeworkers gawking and strip-bar standards playing in the background, several hundred people joined a handful of exotic dancers in front of the Statehouse on Thursday to rally against New Jersey's new indoor smoking ban.

About 20 of the women — who, to the disappointment of some in the crowd, didn't reveal anything more risque than their midriffs — said the ban will result in lost clients and lost money.

"It's going to murder our business," said Dominique Hernandez, 24, who dances at a lounge in Florence. "A lot of people want to get off of work, have a drink and a smoke and watch some pretty girls. There's nothing wrong with that."

Apparently not, judging by the looks Hernandez — in tight jeans and a revealing black T-shirt — received from onlookers.

"I'm just passing by on the way to the office," was the refrain from many men, and some women, in the crowd.

But many said they came to protest the smoking ban, saying it was a violation of their rights.

"I've been a smoker since I was 13 and it's really against our rights," said Allan Brophy, 24, of Union. "Pretty soon they're going to be outlawing it in our houses."

Brophy did admit that word of strippers at the rally had "piqued my interest."{...}

Strippers, who are being hit in the G-string by yet another smoking ban, are out there, fighting for their fiscal survival. God love 'em.

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Ok, so moving along from doughy stuff, I should probably make you aware this is the section where you'll find recipes---ahem---to MAKE YOUR OWN BOOZE.

Perhaps not in this installment, but maybe in the next.

Take the jump anyway so you don't feel like a schmuck when you come back for the next few. Besides, there's some early 20th Century medical benefits to drinking buttermilk listed that might interest some of you. more...

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Oprah's codependent.

NEW YORK - Oprah Winfrey broke her silence about James Frey's disputed memoir of addiction, "A Million Little Pieces," dismissing allegations of falsehoods as "much ado about nothing" and urging readers who have been inspired by the book to "Keep holding on."

"What is relevant is that he was a drug addict ... and stepped out of that history to be the man he is today and to take that message to save other people and allow them to save themselves," Winfrey said Wednesday night in a surprise phone call to CNN's Larry King, who was interviewing Frey on his live television program.{...}

If Random House is offering people their money back, well, that just means like the Paris incident last summer, Oprah's once again having a momentary delusion of grandeur. And just like last summer, it's all about the delusion of what she thinks is happening in her world, while the rest of us see something entirely different.

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Ok, since everyone else is doing it and I'm a sucker that way with the peer pressure, those of you who stop by on a regular basis but who don't comment and leave me wondering about who the hell you are when I troll through the referral logs, here's your golden opportunity to, for once, put me out of my misery.

It's time to delurk, my devoted Cake Eater readers.

Just click on the comments button below and say 'hi'. You don't have to leave an email address or a web address. Just a name. It can be a fake name, too, but I'll be happy so long as you leave that much.

And if you're one of my regular readers from Iceland (I was checking the super duper server stats today and there were a BOATLOAD of hits from Iceland!) say "hi" and tell me why you are here. Is it that boring there in the winter that you have to surf blogs to keep from going nuts? Do tell.

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Well, it looks like Pat Robertson's really done it this time:

JERUSALEM -Israel will not do business with Pat Robertson after the evangelical leader suggested Prime Minister Ariel Sharon's massive stroke was divine punishment for the Gaza withdrawal, a tourism official said Wednesday.

Robertson is leading a group of evangelicals who have pledged to raise $50 million to build a large Christian tourism center in Israel's northern Galilee region, where tradition says Jesus lived and taught.

But Avi Hartuv, a spokesman for Tourism Minister Avraham Hirschson, said Israeli officials were furious with Robertson, a Christian broadcaster. A day after Sharon's Jan. 4 stroke, Robertson said the prime minister was being punished for "dividing God's land," — a reference to last summer's pullout from the Gaza Strip and four West Bank settlements.

"We can't accept this kind of statement," Hartuv said.

He said the Christian Heritage Center project was now in question, though he left the door open to develop it with others.

"We will not do business with him, only with other evangelicals who don't back these comments," Hartuv said. "We will do business with other evangelical leaders, friends of Israel, but not with him."{...}

Pat Robertson: his big, fat mouth delayed the Second Coming of Christ.

You think the Evangelicals who watch the 700 Club will be happy about this development? I think a hooker has a better chance of being caught up by the Rapture than Robertson has of getting out of this with his skin intact.

Posted by: Kathy at 09:52 AM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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1 No, a hooker has a better chance of getting out of this than Robertson has of being caught up by the Rapture.

Posted by: Bob at January 11, 2006 10:31 AM (yMzz+)

2 "Pat Robertson: his big, fat mouth delayed the Second Coming of Christ." Heh.

Posted by: Doug at January 11, 2006 11:16 AM (oiTVK)

3 In the minds of people who live in the real world, Pat has lost it. Not surprisingly however, his fans think he's courageous: http://www.jnewswire.com/library/article.php?articleid=942 Beam me up.

Posted by: EveningStar at January 11, 2006 05:02 PM (xr/uv)

4 Say, do you think that Pat Robertson believes in Karma after this?

Posted by: Pious Agnostic at January 11, 2006 06:07 PM (A9wtV)

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More doughy goodness after the jump.

{part one, part two} more...

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Dododododododododododododoooooooo.

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Muscle weighs more than fat.

Say it with me. Muscle weighs more than fat.

Lather, rinse, repeat.

And if you say it enough times, it might actually turn out to be true.

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So...I can't keep a lid on this one any longer.

I was hoping the urge to discuss it would pass me by, but it hasn't. Hence I'm going to submit to it and let the cards fall where they may.

This person I know---who shall remain anonymous---is receiving an unusual present for Christmas. I say "receiving" because they haven't actually gotten their present yet, but will be sometime in the near future.

You, my devoted Cake Eater readers, are undoubtedly wondering what this "unusual" Christmas present is.

Well, it's a boob job.

It's something that she wants, and her husband is quite happy with her the way she is, but has told her if this is what she really wants, she should go ahead with it and this will be her Christmas present.

What say you, my devoted Cake Eater readers? Would you be happy with a boob job for a Christmas present? Would you be happy, if you're one of my male Cake Eater readers, giving your wife this present, instead of, say, a nice piece of jewelry? Or is this just like giving money to your spouse to buy that bass fishing boat they've always wanted.

Discuss.

Posted by: Kathy at 09:57 AM | Comments (14) | Add Comment
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More doughy stuff after the jump, including the Boston Brown Bread recipe from the Palmer House in Chicago, and the Corn Bread recipe from the St. Charles Hotel in New Orleans.

You can find part one here. more...

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Look for Oprah to rid herself of her book club---again---in the very near future.

Then look for an episode where she talks about how betrayed she feels about all of this and how the emotional upheaval caused her to eat five fried chickens and some plain white toast.

{Hat tip: Miss Margi}

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Quality filler swiped from Sheila...read on after the jump if you're interested. more...

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For all manner of yeasty, doughy stuff---including how to make your own yeast---take the jump.

The husband says all you home brewers will probably want to pay attention to the bit on how to make your own yeast. more...

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Because he bought us, his favorite tenants, a gift card to this place for Christmas.

(CAN YOU FREAKIN' BELIEVE IT??? THERE ARE GOOD LANDLORDS OUT THERE! THEY'RE NOT AN EXTINCT SPECIES! HURRAH!)

The restaurant is large and airy and is, quite literally, within stumbling distance from the Cake Eater pad. The booze is good. The food is even better. The people watching is excellent.

The dessert rules as well. (Apple spice cake with creme anglaise. Mmmmm)

And they have quotes on the wall.

My favorite?

How can you not love a restaurant brave enough to quote Hannibal the Cannibal?

Posted by: Kathy at 08:48 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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1 What a lovely thing to do. Makes this cynical NY'er think you're paying too much in rent, however.

Posted by: Random Penseur at January 08, 2006 05:39 AM (fWrQ6)

2 I'm assuming they serve fava beans. And a nice chianti.

Posted by: The Random Yak at January 10, 2006 12:28 PM (dsGTv)

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You Have Your PhD in Men

You understand men almost better than anyone. You accept that guys are very different, and you read signals well. Work what you know about men, and your relationships will be blissful.

{hat tip: Cal Tech Girl}

Posted by: Kathy at 12:03 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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1 Same here, though it was pretty easy to figure out the answers they wanted.

Posted by: Paula at January 08, 2006 08:11 AM (gOF1b)

2 Ooooh I'm so swiping this.

Posted by: agent bedhead at January 08, 2006 02:50 PM (xV63t)

3 It's odd, I know, but I apparently understand men well too! Except that, um, sometimes, even when we're looking right at you, we're still not paying attention.

Posted by: andy at January 08, 2006 10:08 PM (llVZH)

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Damned if you don't.

CHARLES Kennedy put his political life on the line last night, admitting to a serious drink problem and calling an election, in a gamble that could see him sacked as Liberal Democrat leader.

After weeks of damaging speculation about his position, he was forced into an unprecedented public confession after the emergence of hard evidence that he had received medical treatment for alcohol misuse.

The scale of his colleagues' unhappiness with Mr Kennedy also became clear. Some 11 members of his front-bench have signed a letter calling for him to resign, and had planned to present it to him on Monday.

The twin revelations forced the Lib Dem leader into a desperate gamble, when he admitted he had repeatedly lied about his problem.

"Over the past 18 months, I have been coming to terms with, and seeking to cope with, a drink problem," Mr Kennedy said in a statement at his party's London headquarters. "I've sought professional help, and I believe today that this issue is essentially resolved.

"People close to me know that this has been a struggle," he said, insisting he had not had a drink for the past two months.

Within hours, several senior MPs who had been seen as possible challengers praised their leader's bravery and honesty in making his statement and said they would not stand against him.

But for all its dignity, Mr Kennedy's admission exposes him to grave political risk. Until yesterday, he had always denied having a drink problem and disputed suggestions that he'd had to seek medical help as a result. Now, he has admitted lying about his condition and offered opponents several opportunities to attack his character and integrity. {...}

Welcome to the Wide, Wonderful World of Alcoholism, my devoted Cake Eater Readers.

Mr. Kennedy's problems, woeful though they may be, are the same as any other alcoholic's, but with a bigger plot twist. Most alcoholics do try to keep their problem a secret; they try to hide it from the world, but in Mr. Kennedy's case, well, he's a politician: you can't hide things from the world. As a politician, you don't receive any measure of privacy, so people who don't buy your story about not having a drink problem deliberately seek to out you to the world---a world they know won't approve of you and your problem. Then they label you a "liar" because you tried to keep your problem private---because you know the stigma your problem carries---and you think telling the truth isn't an option.

Is the word "Ouroborous" ringing a bell here, kids?

No one can win in such a situation. No one. And we're all the worse for it.

UPDATED: And he quit. Go freakin' figure.

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parts one, two and three.

Take the jump for the absolute last of the facts worth knowing!

more...

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Hmmm.

NORFOLK, Va. — Christian broadcaster Pat Robertson suggested Thursday that Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon's stroke was divine punishment for "dividing God's land."

"God considers this land to be his," Robertson said on his TV program "The 700 Club." "You read the Bible and he says `This is my land,' and for any prime minister of Israel who decides he is going to carve it up and give it away, God says, `No, this is mine.'"

Sharon, who ordered Israel's withdrawal from Gaza last year, suffered a severe stroke on Wednesday.

In Robertson's broadcast from his Christian Broadcasting Network in Virginia Beach, the evangelist said he had personally prayed about a year ago with Sharon, whom he called "a very tender-hearted man and a good friend." He said he was sad to see Sharon in this condition.

He also said, however, that in the Bible, the prophet Joel "makes it very clear that God has enmity against those who 'divide my land.'"

Sharon "was dividing God's land and I would say woe unto any prime minister of Israel who takes a similar course to appease the EU (European Union), the United Nations, or the United States of America," Robertson said.{...}

So, according to Robertson's logic, if I took Robertson out, I could claim God wanted me to do it because He was mad at Pat for all his idiotic statements. Because there's some bit in the Bible---God only knows where it is---about not listening to false prophets and God just wanted to mete out some justice and I was His vessel.

Right?

{hat tip: Everyone's Favorite Commie Pinko}

Posted by: Kathy at 10:38 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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1 I like it! Can I help, huh? That way I can be God's vessel too?? No point you get all the praise!

Posted by: Ally at January 06, 2006 09:10 AM (ZnGgh)

2 It seems to me God's not particularly hindered by such idiots. Still, isn't it about time we Christians turn to Pat Robertson and all shouted in unison, "Would you just shut-the-eff-up?" Love Scott Ott's take -- http://www.scrappleface.com/?p=2129

Posted by: Bob at January 06, 2006 01:41 PM (yMzz+)

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The Elder is looking for some dinero to help some Mexican orphans.

Go and help if you can.

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The husband was finally able to visit his preferred cigar vendor yesterday.

The branch shop the husband used to visit was shut down recently due to decreased sales because of the increase in tobacco taxation health impact fees, so he had to visit the main shop downtown. He finally got this done, and because it was above freezing yesterday afternoon, the husband and I decided to go for a walk after we bought our Powerball ticket.

So, we've purchased what we think, of course, will be the winner and we're meandering our way through Cake Eater downtown when we come upon the Grandmothers for Peace. Every Wednesday, these women take up real estate on corners in Cake Eater downtown and flash signs that read "End the Occupation," or "Peace" or "Out of Iraq Now" to the passing traffic. Some people honk. Most drive by in silence. If it's warmer, some people yell obscenities. The husband---now happily smoking his cigar in the chilly, early evening air---and I avoid these women on two different corners as we cross the street. I keep my mouth shut and keep walking. Suddenly I notice I'm all alone. (It's Minnesota and it's chilly outside: you keep your head down.)

The husband had left me. To go and "chat" with one of the Grandmas.

As I was about fifteen feet beyond him and I couldn't hear what he said to them.

But I did see how they responded to whatever it was he said.

They stuck their protest signs up in such a way as to ward him off, like he was a disease. And they did it like they were little kids. One of the women was agitated and started waving her sign in front of the husband's face. After a moment's conversation, he turned and walked away.

He caught up with me a moment later and I asked him what he said to have them respond in such a way. He replied that he'd simply said that ten thousand little girls in Iraq now get to go to school.

How bloody childish can you get? Did she say anything? No. Did she tell the husband she was glad to hear his opinion, even if she disagreed with it? No. She waved her sign in his face. As if he was a vampire and it was a bulb of garlic meant to ward him off.

Which leads me to this thought, my devoted Cake Eater readers: in the restaurant of life, pacifists dine and dash. They're thieves. They eat the good food, they drink the good wine, they enjoy the ambience of the restaurant, but when the tab comes to the table, they get up and run because they won't pay the bill. It's not that they can't pay the bill; it's that they won't. They've made a conscious choice to say, hey, I love all that society has to offer, but I love it so much more than the average person, I won't pay for it because I believe it should all be free. And then runs out the door before someone can stop them.

Oh, sure, theoretically they're allowed. They're allowed to say all they want, until their faces turn blue and their tongues fall out. That's the beauty of free speech. But most of us realize that freedom isn't free. It never has been and it never will be. Freedom requires sacrifice and these pacifists, these Grandmothers for Peace, will never be willing to make any sacrifice to serve the greater good. It's not because they can't make the sacrifice; it's because they won't make the sacrifice. They want everything good, but they don't want to pay for it. They're freeloaders. They dine and dash.

How well do you think that goes over with the waitstaff?

Posted by: Kathy at 05:38 PM | Comments (24) | Add Comment
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