...wherein a good fifty people who came to the Cake Eater Chronicles on a daily basis to read said crap have gone on vacation for what seems is the entire month of July.

The little traitors.

What is it with you people, eh? I put out perfectly good content, day in and day out, to amuse/educate/enlighten y'all and you people desert me, like rats from a barge loaded with bat guano, the minute the weather turns nice. Oh, sure. I provide a great escape from your troubles in the winter, but when summer comes around, well, it's a Wham, Bam, I'm Off To the Beach, Ma'am situation.

Pfft.

Get with the program and start pumping my sitemeter back up or I'll export all the labor of this here operation to India. Then I'll sic Lou Dobbs on you. He'll start plugging "The Exporting of the Cake Eater Chronicles" on his newshour. He'll interview me and in reply, when he starts cutting into me for my behavior, I'll say, "Hey, Lou, what do you want me to do? I'm apparently too expensive for my readers. I've got to cut costs somewhere, and labor is my biggest cost. A typing monkey in Bangalore is much cheaper than I am and is bound to attract more American readers, given that their particular tastes run to Asian Lesbian pr0n." Lou will be saddened by the news, but, surprisingly, he will finally get a grip, take things in context and he will understand. In response, he will turn on you my not-so-devoted Cake Eater readers, and it'll be ugly.

So, save yourself the trouble of being flogged day in and day out by Lou Dobbs, my-soon-to-be-devoted-again Cake Eater readers, and get with the program, ya dig?

You honestly don't want to have to wash that hairshirt every day, do you?

Posted by: Kathy at 12:43 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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