Ok, I̢۪m breaking my one blog a day rule. Man, people like this just chap my ass. If you don̢۪t want your kids watching CSI perhaps it would behoove you to turn the effing set off.
Or would that just be too much to ask? I̢۪m sure it probably is,
because everything in this world has to have a impossible-to-open
safety cap on it lest the children be harmed. And God only
knows, kids are SO much more important than adults these days. {Insert
Whitney Houston bleating on about how she believes the children are our
future}
Gag.
I love kids. I don̢۪t have any of my own yet, but that will change one
of these days. I am an aunt to twenty-two nieces and nephews and one
great niece. I hang out with kids. I play with them. I enjoy their
company. It̢۪s the parents that drive me nuts.
I̢۪ve noticed a phenomenon over and over again. Perhaps you̢۪ve
noticed it yourself. When a friend becomes preggers, they will suddenly
act as if they̢۪re the only woman over millions of year̢۪s worth of
humanity to carry a baby to term and then give birth. There are a few
rare instances of sanity out there, like my sisters and my friend ML,
but for the most part, these women are out of whack with reality. The
world revolves around them for nine months and then, low and behold,
the attention switches to the kid. But not really. If you know any
women like this, you̢۪ll know that the way they boost themselves and
make themselves feel better is by providing the absolute best they can possibly can for their child.
Nothing can be too good for their children. They must have the best of
everything from preschools with waiting lists to expensive Baby Gap
crap. And they̢۪re shielded from scrutiny because who, in their right
mind, wouldn̢۪t want the best for a child? If you dare to suggest
differently, you̢۪re suddenly an infidel, storming the vaunted bastion
of motherhood, so don̢۪t be surprised when the boiling oil comes
raining down. I can grasp the concept that life changes when you have a
child. Your world does tilt on its axis. It̢۪s like getting a dog,
wrought overlarge and accessorized by Gymboree. I can understand that
you have a life to feed, clothe, shelter and educate, and that you want
the best for them. It̢۪s completely understandable that you̢۪d follow
that instinct, but isn̢۪t it a wee bit much to ask that everyone else
be expected to raise your child as well and then object when your
standards aren̢۪t being followed? Now, I̢۪m sure someone was just
inflamed by me comparing a child to a dog, but when I was a kid, you
were seen and not heard. Nowadays, it takes a monstrous effort to not
see and hear children. If you haven̢۪t taken the time to notice, dogs
these days are the only ones allowed to just run around the yard and
goof off. Kids can̢۪t do that anymore.
This it takes a village crap drives me insane. It does take a
village to raise a child, but the modern concept of loving and
nurturing our beloved youth that Hillary put forth is not the same that
I grew up with and I̢۪m fairly sure it̢۪s producing a generation of
spoiled brats. Kids are more aware of power paradigms than adults are
and it never ceases to surprise me how many parents forget this.
Everyone̢۪s taller than you when you̢۪re a kid, so when you finally
realize that height doesn̢۪t really have much to do with who̢۪s in
charge, you̢۪ll take advantage of the situation. It̢۪s completely
human behavior. Don̢۪t be surprised that junior picked up on it before
you did. After all, kids are exceedingly bright these days. Don̢۪t
give them some lengthy explanation about why they
can̢۪t tear apart the coffee shop, or race madly around everyone
else̢۪s tables, pick them up and leave. They don̢۪t understand what
the hell you’re talking about anyway becauseâ€Â¦ahemâ€Â¦they’re TWO. If you’re the boss, act like it. That means, dare I suggest it, parenting.
If junior decides to stage a full blown temper tantrum in the middle of
the mall, to teach him that behavior is not acceptable, you leave the
mall. You do not buy junior a treat to shut him up. You don̢۪t have to
be a child psychologist to realize that, ahem, you̢۪re rewarding them
for bad behavior, so, duh, they̢۪ll do it again the next time they
want a sweet. As you might have guessed, there are a lot of these
children in Cake Eater land. In my childhood, if you were out of line
while playing over at a friend̢۪s house, your friend̢۪s mom or dad
felt it was ok to correct you. I̢۪ll never forget the day Mrs. McGill
washed my
mouth out with soap. I̢۪d heard of that dreaded treatment from the
McGill kids and, stupidly, thought I was immune from punishment in
their house. Nope. I sure as hell learned not to say “Jesus” in a
non-respectful manner and my mother completely approved of the action
because she trusted Mrs. McGill. Can you even imagine someone doing
that nowadays? And I̢۪m only in my early thirties, folks. This
wasn̢۪t that long ago. Not that I̢۪m saying other people should be
washing a playmate̢۪s mouth out with soap, but I think you get what
I̢۪m driving at. The line has been drawn in the sandbox. Criticism of
a child, in whatever form, is bad. The Village concept that is so
popular today seems to say, to me at least, water everything down---across the board---because—GASP---we must protect the children. They’re so innocent, precious and vulnerable. The adult world cannot come anywhere near my precious child. We must ensure their innocence lasts as long as it can. They must have a childhood while it is still possible.
Crikeys. You̢۪d think the world was going to end if the kid ends up
playing doctor with their friend down the street. Not that that would
happen anymore, either.
Oh, and the concept also seems to recommend a yearly trip to
Disneyland/World to keep the economies of Anaheim and Orlando going.
Homage must be paid to Mickey, after all. He̢۪s our God. I will swear,
right now, on a stack of Bibles, that when the husband and I do have
kids, I̢۪m never buying one damn Disney product. Michael Eisner will
get none of our money. And our resolve is strong! Now, I̢۪m sure
someone out there is getting ready to write me a really nasty email.
Fine. Go ahead. I̢۪m an adult. I can take it.
I will repeat that I don̢۪t hate kids. I love them. It̢۪s the parents
with the screws that are loose. Did you look at that list of “family
friendly” entertainment? How on earth did “8 Simple Rules for
Dating My Teenage Daughter,” get on the list? That show is basically
one big homage to slickly dressed girls trying to get around their
overprotective fathers. This
show is family friendly? Explain this one to me, because I̢۪m just not
getting it. How, precisely does a show that promotes excellent human
characteristics of lying and sneaking around get to be family friendly?
Bare midriffs are family friendly nowadays? When I was a teenager, if I
dressed the way those girls do on that show, my very overprotective
father would have shoved me in a closet, locked the door and lost the
key until I̢۪d come to my senses. Virtue, however, seems as if it̢۪s
become such a rare commodity these days that it must be celebrated
wherever it is found. Even on an inane television sitcom. It used to be
the norm that it was expected. Not so anymore, and it̢۪s the Parents
Television Council̢۪s job to celebrate the loss by saying this show is
family friendly. Is it just me, or are they celebrating what fifteen
years ago were after-school specials? I̢۪m not even going to touch the
“Star Search” commendation. It’ll just inflame me further.
The rest of the list is watered down garbage. You couldn̢۪t pay me to
watch those shows. They blow. As far as the “worst” shows were
concerned, yeah, some of those shows really do suck. “Fastlane” is
garbage, not because you have Tiffani-Amber Thiessen̢۪s heaving bosoms
in view as much as is possible without giving the cameraman a sore
neck, but because it̢۪s stupid. CSI, however, is not stupid. It̢۪s an
intelligent show that challenges your mind. What̢۪s so wrong with
that? So what if it focuses on adult topics? It̢۪s meant to be watched by adults.
If you happen to have a junior, well, make sure you know what they̢۪re
watching. Then turn the set off if you don̢۪t like what they̢۪re
watching and make them read a book. If it takes a village to raise a
child, perhaps it might behoove parents out there to realize that
it̢۪s our
village as well. You know who I̢۪m referring to: those pesky adults
who haven̢۪t produced a playmate for yours yet. I don̢۪t want your
child dictating what I can or cannot watch on television. Ok, rant off!

Posted by: Kathy at 04:59 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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